A night to remember

I’ve had an interesting weekend.

Last Friday, we celebrated my father-in-law’s birthday by going to a dinner/dance event at this banquet hall he frequently goes to. I asked Steve what the name of the place is so that I could “Google” it in advance. “Googling” is something that’s become a habit of mine. If I wanted to check out a restaurant or a nail spa or a hair salon or even check out a store, I would go online and search for the website first before deciding on whether I should physically go there. Steve says I’m a little nuts for doing this but I tell him it’s perfectly reasonable to want to know whether the place I am going to is worth my time and effort. He finds it funny that if I wanted to check out a shoe store, I would first go their website and see what they have online and then call the store to see if they carry the styles I am interested in and if they have my size in-store. He calls it crazy, I call it research.

Anyhoo, the website for this dinner/dance event specified that there was a dress code which made me a bit uncomfortable. Any event that calls for a dress code always has the tendency to make me feel anxious. I’m not particularly good at doing my own hair and make-up so any event that’s fancy enough for me to have to do my hair and make-up is somewhat stressful. I did eventually manage to pull myself together and go to this thing.

I later found out that this dinner/dance is actually a single’s mixer. But it wasn’t a mixer for the young and the hip… rather, it was a mixer for the 50 and over… Steve calls it “the geriatrics mixer”. I felt out-of-place… Steve, my sister-in-law and I were probably the only ones under 50 there if you don’t count the bartender and the personnel selling the tickets by the door! At first I thought, “hey this isn’t so bad, we can grab dinner and maybe dance a bit and then go home”. Boy was I wrong! I had barely finished eating when a guy in his early 50’s (maybe?) asked me for a dance. I usually decline dances with strangers (I just find it so uncomfortable) but because these men were older, I thought it would be disrespectful to do so. I mean, how much harm could it possibly be if these men were old enough to be my dad or even my grandpa right? So there I was on the dance floor with this man and the first thing he says to me is, “I couldn’t decide who to ask first… you or the other girl.. I wasn’t sure which one of you was with the guy…” OMG I couldn’t believe it! I just laughed and told him that he asked the wrong girl. I was with “the guy” and that I’m actually married to him. He then said, “Oh.. okay.. I’ll ask the other girl later”. I couldn’t help but grin widely. I knew how feisty my sister-in-law can be. I politely answered all of his questions, danced the entire length of the song (despite the fact the he smelled strongly of cigarettes), thanked him for the dance and then went back to my table. Steve found it amusing because he knew how uncomfortable I was.

Shortly after, another man approached and asked if I would mind dancing. I politely declined but he was rather insistent and since Steve told me to go ahead, I decided to once again venture out into the dance floor with yet another stranger. The first thing he asked me was whether I came to the mixer often. I told him no, it was my first time and that I came to celebrate my father-in-law’s birthday. He seemed surprised that I was married although I don’t know why he would be since I was beside Steve the entire time. I joked with Steve later on by saying that maybe my engagement and wedding rings weren’t big and sparkly enough for people to notice. Hahahaha!

I didn’t mind the dances – they were innocent. But what made the entire thing uncomfortable was how aggressive some of these men were and how often they kept coming to our table and trying to get phone numbers and such. It really was very, very weird. One man even told my sister-in-law that he could “take care” of her and that he had the means to do so. It’s like these men had no shame saying these things in front of Steve and their dad!

I couldn’t help but feel bad for some of the people there. What if they’re lonely? I couldn’t help but think that maybe some of them have lost their spouses and are now single and are in want of another life partner. Granted, some of the men there were strange and aggressive and unbelievable but I’m sure some of them were decent and are maybe there for the right reasons – to meet someone they can potentially have a relationship with.

In any case, this was definitely a memorable experience... for so many reasons.