Love This

"I think one thing sort of defines it which is, it's not how much you love someone when you love them, but it's how much you love them when you hate them. It's when you're in that moment where you cannot stand what the person you're with is doing, but you still love them. That's when you need to show it -- not just say it, but show it." (Ashton Kutcher)

Dedication

When you’re about to read a book, do you read who it’s dedicated to?

I always do. I always wonder who the author is dedicating the book to or who he/she is thanking. The ones that I love to read are those dedicated to the author’s parents, spouse, and children. I find those the most touching. I think it’s really thoughtful and sweet when an author writes even the simplest of poems to express the amount of love and gratitude they have for their loved ones.

Today, I opened a book and this is what the author put:

For my husband, Ian
My heart, my love, my home

For someone to have so much love and respect for one’s spouse is truly magical and special.

A Sad Passing...

I had to work during the Civic Holiday so I get tomorrow off instead. Yay! I’ve been meaning to do some errands and catch up on a few things so I’m pretty happy about getting the day off. The only downside is that Steve doesn’t get it off with me so he’ll be stuck at work the entire day. Bummer.

While on MSN the other day, I came across the sad news of Cory Aquino passing away. I am always stunned when I hear about such a prominent and influential individual passing away. I was surprised when Francis M. and Michael Jackson died and I got that exact same shock when I found out about Cory. I can’t help but feel that they were taken away too soon. I remember my dad telling us about the EDSA revolution. I was only a few months shy of being a three-year old at the time and my brother, JR, barely a year old when it occurred. As no one knew how the revolution was going to turn out or what it would mean for the Filipino people, my dad was apparently very worried that it might mean hoarding of goods and supplies and shortage of food. He was particularly worried about the possibility of the shortage of milk – being a dad to two very young children. So he had taken all the money he had with him to the grocery store and bought all the baby formula he could afford. My parents had bought enough baby formula to fill up a small cabinet. They wanted to be sure that if anything should happen, we wouldn’t go starving. Yes, it’s a small thing in the grand scheme of things but I love knowing that my parents always put us first in every situation. It’s one of the many sacrifices they’ve done for our benefit which is why I love my parents very much.

I saw an eighteen-minute snippet of Kris Aquino’s speech during the funeral ceremony and I couldn’t help but get a bit emotional. I can’t imagine the pain of losing a parent. I don’t even want to think of it.

I look forward to a time when death will be no more.

As Revelation 21:4 says:

And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.

Do You Need to Be Lucky to Find Love?

Do You Need to Be Lucky to Find Love?
by Rich Santos

Looking around at the earth's processes, I'm reminded of how lucky we are to have beautiful things in the world.

Way beneath the earth's surface, when carbon has been placed under enough pressure, diamonds are formed. It takes millions of years for this process to occur. When a parasite drills into a mollusks' shell, that mollusk performs a set of defensive actions that result in the formation of a pearl.

Okay, maybe love happens easier than diamonds or pearls happen. Or does it? Like other beautiful things in nature, a lot of things have to happen for anything to culminate. One of the main governing forces over these kinds of processes is good old-fashioned luck.

Here are four elements of falling in love that require a little bit of luck to ensure success, in my opinion:

Timing
When two people meet and start hanging out, a key to taking the next step in a relationship is where people are in their lives. Are they both in a position to be able to be close to someone? Perhaps one of the two is working on their career too much, or maybe someone has just been through a painful relationship not too long before, and can't commit.

When it all works out, people come into one another's life at just the right time. And, luck has a lot to do with it because you really can't plan it — you can only hope that it happens just right.

Circumstance
Circumstance dictates the entire process of running into a person. Are you both living in the same town? What brought you there? Every meeting you have with every person in your life is determined by a combination of personal choices and events in your life. As Back to the Future taught us, even the most minute choice/action can change the future.

If you want to go even further back, your existence is based on events and choices of ancestors before you stretching far back in time. So, not only are we all lucky to be on earth, but we are lucky that our significant other is on earth as well, and even luckier that circumstance brought us together.

First Impression
They say first impression is everything. This holds true in business and pleasure. We base so much on that first meeting with a person. There's a lot of luck involved. People like me are lucky when we can control what we say and not screw anything up right off the bat. OK, maybe there is some control over that, but what about subtle things?

Perhaps when you approach someone in a bar, a particular song happens to be on, or the lighting and atmosphere are just right to give your meeting a little more impact. Making a memorable and emotional first impression is not easy; so a little luck always helps.

Chemistry
When my high school teacher told me that everything a human does is based on chemical reactions in the brain, I was floored. From then on I walked around wondering about the chemical reactions going on in my head that made me wave to a friend, or snap my fingers along with a song. Hell, how do the chemicals in my brain even make me like a song?

With so much complex brain chemistry telling us what we like, what we do, who we are, and if we are happy or sad, we are lucky that people even exist that we can blend with. I am convinced that my brain chemistry is so scrambled that there are no possible compatible female minds. But I'll keep looking, and perhaps I will be lucky enough to meet someone who is not only compatible, but makes all my brain chemistry happy.

Article swiped from MSN Lifestyle


I saw this article on MSN this morning and I thought I'd share it here because I think it's so true. I completely agree that timing, circumstance, first impression and chemistry all play a role in what relationship we'll develop with each other. It's funny because these are things we can't control and yet they have such a huge effect on what happens next. Do I think that falling in-love involves luck? Maybe...

Hug!

If you're angry at a loved one, hug that person.
And mean it. You may not want to hug - which is all the more reason to do so.

It's hard to stay angry when someone shows they love you, and that's precisely what happens when we hug each other.

Hugging is important. It is more than just a sign of affection. It comforts, offers support and encouragement, and it has the ability to calm worry and fear. It is a simple act of wrapping your arms around another person and yet it has the ability to make someone feel better.

If you haven't hugged someone today, make sure you do so. Hugging is a feel-good exercise after all.

Do you agree?

Brain scans show that when a man’s brain is in a resting state, at least 70 percent of his brain is shut down. On the other hand, when women were resting, at least 90 percent of their brain was active, confirming that women are always thinking...

In another study, when asked to think of nothing, men’s brains were more active in the more primitive physical activity centers, while women’s brains were more active in the emotional centers. Left to themselves, men will think about sex or their jump shot, women will think about their spouse, their children or parents.

-Excerpt from Sex on the Brain by Daniel G. Amen

I came across this excerpt while reading Chatelaine at the doctor's office. I thought it was interesting because I find that even when I don't want to think, I'm constantly thinking. I sometimes feel as though my brain just won't shut down. Not that I have any trouble sleeping... the opposite actually. As soon as I lie down, I'm fast asleep. But I do suspect that even when I am asleep, my mind is still working away which is probably why I dream a lot and why I remember most of my dreams. I always wondered if people thought as much as I do.

Even when I am sitting quietly or staring into space, I am still thinking.

Do you have faith?

Faith is the assured expectation of things hoped for, the evident demonstration of realities though not beheld. – Heb 11:1

I love this particular Bible verse from the book of Hebrews.

Do you think that all people have faith? Not necessarily faith in God but just faith in general? I’d like to think that all of us have faith in someone or something (if not God). Let’s face it, life’s difficult as it is and I can’t imagine anyone going through life without having any kind of faith... faith in one's self...faith that things will work out in the end... faith that something good will eventually come out of it...faith that someone up there is watching. Not having faith in anything almost feels like going through life without any form of hope or destination. Even when things are great, don't you still need faith that things will remain the way they are or that should things go wrong, that it will right itself in the end?

I just find it hard to believe that there are people out there who don't have faith at all.

Where do you put your faith in?

Mind-boggling.

I was reading an article on MSN this morning about a few individuals who are considered medical mysteries. I found it quite interesting so I thought I’d share it with you.

It’s pretty amazing how different and yet similar we all truly are.

Read Dr. Oz Investigates Medical Mysteries.

I can't imagine being so physically different. I can only imagine the challenges it must present. I admire the strength and the heart that these people have.

A lot of people tell me I have an excellenet memory but wow, Jill sure has an outstanding memory! Although interesting, I'm sure it must be difficult to remember things that you would rather forget. They say that the brain automatically "forgets" anything that might be too painful or traumatic. Imagine not being able to forget? It must be hard.

I love the question that Dr. Oz presents at the end of the article:

"But the real question in my mind—I wonder if all of us have memories we can't access or if you're able to store more memories than any of us can..."

I've always wondered if we do somehow record everything that happens to us but we just don't always know how to access all of our memories. And I also wonder how our brain decides on which memories we remember and which ones we don't. It really is interesting.

Suddenly feeling old

I was just on Friendster looking at people’s profiles and photos and god I suddenly feel old. Seeing friends marry and have kids and all that feels so surreal. It’s as if the last ten years or so flew by in such a blur. One day we were in high school and all of a sudden we’re adults pursuing careers, travelling and having families of our own. Where did time go?

I just saw photos of a girl I was neighbors with back in the Philippines and I was a bit surprised at how much she’s grown. This is the same girl I remember playing with my baby brother in the garden not too long ago (or at least it seems not too long ago). She’s at an age where she can practically go to bars now! I keep forgetting that the kids I knew back then are teens now and are eagerly getting their driver’s licenses and enjoying the privileges of being eighteen. If I am shocked to know that the little kids I held and played with are now in high school and probably already dating, I can just imagine how my own relatives and the people who knew me when I was younger are feeling. They’re also probably reeling from the fact that I’m half-way through my twenties now.

Why is it that before the age of eighteen, time seems to crawl and after you’ve turned eighteen, the years fly by? I was looking at my Outlook calendar this morning during a meeting with a co-worker and I only realized that one of the dates we were discussing is actually my birthday. Wow… another year! It certainly doesn’t feel as though an entire year has gone by even though a lot has happened in the past year alone.

Grabe, how do you think we’ll feel in our forties?

On Growing Up.

Whenever I feel stressed, sad, tired or heartbroken, I can’t help but think of how much easier everything seemed to me when I was younger. The world… and life in general was much simpler.

Being a child gives you some form of freedom that adults don’t typically enjoy. When you make mistakes it is perceived as innocence and immaturity… you can be excused for not knowing any better. You lose this privilege little by little as you grow older. The more you know, more is also expected from you. As an adult, people are less sympathetic. It is easy to be criticized as being immature for your age, stupid, ignorant or inconsiderate. There seems to be a standard for the age you are in and when you fall short of that standard, everyone seems to notice. Someone always has something to say.

I find that our responsibilities and priorities also change as we grow older. As children, we enjoy having fewer responsibilities. But that also meant fewer privileges. While our responsibilities mainly revolved around school work and household chores which were relatively easy to accomplish, we didn’t get much in return for it aside from good grades and our parents’ approval. Some enjoyed an allowance for their hard work but most of us (if not all of us) relied on our parents to provide us with our daily needs. We relied on them to buy as the things we wanted. We even relied on our parents to make decisions for us such as which school we were going to attend and what we were going to bring to school for lunch.

Life gets more complicated the older we get. Suddenly, things aren’t as black and white as they used to be. We worry about our careers, the bills we have to pay, our relationships with other people, and the decisions we have to make. Experience tells us to be wary of others, to be careful about what we say and do because we know that there will always be a consequence to every decision. As we grow, we learn what it is like to strive for something and be disappointed, to wear our heart on our sleeve and get hurt, to realize that there are things beyond our control. We learn our limits, that there are things in life we cannot explain, and that people will sometimes do things we cannot always understand. We strive to have the things we want knowing full well that life has a tendency to throw a few surprises here and there.

Yes, life is so much more complicated now than when I was a child. But it also means so much more to me. I can appreciate the good times because I know what it is like to go through the bad. I know I that I am bound to go through some hiccups, but I also know that things have a way of working out. I’ve met a number of wonderful people and I’ve had some pretty amazing experiences. There are things I know now that I didn’t know before and I am still learning everyday. I’ve had my share of surprises but I’m learning to roll with it. I have had my heart broken but I’ve also had a lot of love. I’ve been disappointed many times but I’ve also had my share of accomplishments. I’ve shed a lot of tears but I’ve also had a lot of laughter.

What I’m trying to say is this: Life gets more complicated as we grow older… but with it comes a lot of good.

I Remember.

People often tell me that I have really good memory. I don’t know why that is but I seem to remember a lot of the things I see or hear. I don’t really tell myself to remember… I just do. I actually think I remember the things I see and hear better than the things I read. For example, when I am in a room listening to someone talking, I can almost always remember what they say even if I just hear something in passing. This seems to amaze Steve a lot.

My brother, JR, is also good at remembering things although he and I don’t always remember the same things. While I am good at remembering details like where things are located in a building and what color an object is or what the place looked like, or processes, he is good at remember titles and lines and names. Every time I go, “hey, do you remember from which movie it is where …” or when I go, “hey, what’s the name of the actor/actress/character again in that movie …” he always knows that answer. He’s awesome at it. I think he’ll win big money on those trivia game shows on TV.

I, for one, can remember if I made a left or a right in a certain area. I can go into a building and remember the turns I make. For example, I remember where stores are located in a mall. I can tell which entrance to go into that is nearest the store you want to go to. I can go into a building and tell you what we passed and what turns we need to make to get out the way we came in. The best way I can describe what it’s like… when I pass an area, my brain seems to take a mental picture of what I see and in some weird way, it begins creating a map in my head. The more often I go to a place, the better this map gets until it comes to a point where I can look at it from the top view or any direction I want. You know those directories/maps you see when you enter a building? It’s kinda like that in my head. I’m good with immediately remembering and making mental directions when it comes to buildings and structures but I am not as good with roads. Steve is better at it. He can drive to a place and remember which roads he took and can always easily figure out how to make our way back. I would easily get lost if I were the one behind the wheel.

Another thing that Steve’s memory is great at, he is insanely good at remembering anything that has to do with history… he remembers dates, names of prominent people and events. He’s awesome with anything that has to do with politics, history and business… he also rocks at geography. All areas I suck at basically. I am particularly bad with geography. How bad? Pretty bad actually. You can ask me where a country or place is located in the map and I will tell you I have no idea. I will most likely look at a world map and spend a long time locating it. I do not remember president’s names, capitals, and historic events. Don’t even ask me about historic dates. It’s like asking a child to give you the full anatomy of a human body. In which case, you will probably be met with a helpless, bewildered, and pitiful look. I am horrible at it.

But ask me where your sister said she was going on Friday, ask me who your cousin said she saw at the party last week, ask me for directions on how to find a store in the mall, which subway stop is nearest to the place you’re heading, ask me what color a certain object is and ask me to describe to you what the place looked like and I will give you the answer. I can even act like a tape recorder and tell you exactly what was said during the conversation. I remember random scientific facts too.

All I need is to see something once or hear it once and I will most likely remember. Of course, this is not to say I will remember absolutely everything since I don’t try to remember things intentionally. I just happen to remember bits and pieces or the whole thing without intending to. I also have no control over how long that memory will stay. My parents always tell me and my brothers how amazed they are that we can remember things that happened when we were very young…when they thought we were too young to remember or understand. I can still remember the weekends we spent at Tito Noel’s rest house… I can remember the house had a big balcony with hardwood floors where JR and I would play with our Matchboxes (toy car brand) and sometimes we would run and slide with our slippers. I can tell you that I remember Tito Bobby carrying JR and I across water that had a lot of Jellyfish in it and that I cried when he put me down in the water because I was terrified of Jellyfish.

There also things I should remember or should have remembered but I don’t. I don’t know how my brain decides on what to remember and what to forget. I sometimes recall things out of the blue and I don’t know why I forgot about it for such a long time. I don’t know why I forget some of the things that are important and remember the mundane, irrelevant details of something else.

It’s all weird how my memory works and sometimes there are certain memories that are a bit fuzzy that I can’t be sure if it really happened or not. I dread the day when my memory begins to fade. I don’t want to forget all the wonderful memories I have.

More on posting.

I just checked my site log and noticed that I currently have a total of 8k plus visits. It’s a combination of returning and unique visitors, I’m sure, but I’m still a bit surprised that there have been that many visitors. When I started blogging, I didn’t even have a stat counter… I put one long after.

I don’t know what people think about my blog and the stuff I write about. I am still a bit hesitant when it comes to my posts… afraid of what people might think, say or feel about it. I’m also a bit worried that someone who I’m not comfortable with reading it will stumble upon it… like someone at work for example. I prefer to keep my personal life far from my professional life (although it’s quite impossible since Steve and I work together and my colleagues and I have tea time in the morning where we talk about what goes with our time outside work). I worry that I might unintentionally hurt someone or that what I write could easily be misunderstood. Kahit paano, I still believe in the saying that some things are just better left unsaid.. in this case, better left unwritten.

Although I post regularly, I don’t always write anything and everything that goes on with my life. If you’ve noticed, I write mostly about the things that are pretty mundane and irrelevant. I have difficulty writing about the things that hit too close to home. I try to, but it’s not always easy for me to just put all of it out there. I’m the type of person that when something’s on my mind or something’s seriously bothering me, I like keeping to myself first until I’m comfortable enough to let someone else know about it.

Another thing, with blogging, I just never know who’s reading and I have to always be mindful of what type of information it is I’m sharing out there. It’s a fine line between providing someone a snippet of your life and providing someone with every piece of information about you. One just cannot be too careful these days especially with so many people having so much access to information online.

I admire other bloggers who have no qualms about writing whatever they want… sana ganun din ako. Yung tipong bahala na kung sino makabasa.. bahala na kung anong isipin nila. I would still be careful when it comes to the information I post out there. But I want to be more frank, be more open about my opinions and hopefully be more encouraged to share bits and pieces of things that are personal yet worth sharing. Maybe someone will take something good out of it… who knows!

Maybe I’ll take it one post at a time.

Discussions.

The other day while we were all sitting in Steve’s office having coffee, we were discussing the story in the news about a guy who got caught on camera taking out a hand gun and shooting several people. It wasn’t as if it happened late at night… I think it might have actually taken place early in the evening. It truly is sad to hear people getting shot, stabbed, mugged and abused in the news on such a regular basis. It almost feels as if our headlines revolve on people getting hurt or killed. It’s all we hear nowadays. It really is depressing that the world we live in has become such an unsafe place and that people have started to become desensitized to crime. Since when is taking the life of another human being an acceptable and automatic solution to a disagreement between individuals? Ganun na lang ba? If you do something I don’t like, do I just take a gun a shoot you and get it over with? Where did the morals of our society go?

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At work one morning, while sipping our coffees and eating our bagels, we started talking about people begging for money on the streets. How there’s always a guy begging for money so he can go home or go to a certain place, a guy begging for money for food and another begging for money for medicine or milk or diapers for a baby. I’m sure most of you if not all, have given money at some point. I know I have. The sad thing is, I’m not always so sure they are spending/using the money for the right reasons. The guy who claims he needs money to buy a bus ticket home is still there… in that same spot in the mall entrance, still begging for money to go home several years after I’ve given him some money. I don’t know what to think… was he lying about needing the money to go home and I was just an idiot who fell for it? Did something else happen and he ended up using the money for that? In all these years that have gone by, does he still not have enough money to buy that bus ticket home?

A co-worker was telling me that he once gave some change to a guy who cleaned his windshield on the highway and the guy ended up throwing the change back at him. I guess he wanted more… but for someone who is needy, you’d think he’d at least be appreciative. I’ve also heard about a woman carrying her baby and asking for money outside the grocery store saying she needed to buy milk or diapers for her baby. But when she was given the diapers/milk, she asked if she could have the receipt as well. What for? One can’t help but think that she will prolly go into the store, return the items and get the money back. If she needed the said items for the baby, why then does she need to return them for the money?

I like giving alms but it’s discouraging when you encounter people who take advantage of you. Tinutulungan na nga, nangaabuso pa. Nakakainis diba? I’m not saying all of them are just out to get you. I think that there are those who really are needy and will put the money you give them to good use. I feel bad because those that abuse the goodness of others ruin it for those who are genuinely in need. Now people are more wary and hesitant in helping. People are less inclined to be compassionate because every one is worried they will be taken advantage of in one way or another.

At the same time I also can’t help but think that maybe those that take advantage and who lie feel compelled to do so because maybe even when they ask nicely, people are just so uncompassionate and maybe they feel the need to come up with ways to get people to give.

I just wish people would strive to be better persons.

Parents.

… It’s about the children, not about you. Often, parents project their own dramas and issues on their kids and this puts a lot of undue pressure on them. Our kids are not there to raise us and take care of us. As much as possible, we should not burden them with our own problems. We are there to parent, not be parented…

Steve and I often talk about how we envision parenting… having discussions about parenting dos and don’ts and what we think we would do in certain situations. We often look at our experiences with our own parents and what we would want to follow and what we would want to do differently.

It’s not to say that I think my parents are awful. On the contrary I have really awesome parents. I have a lot of respect for them and there are a lot of things I would also want to follow when I have my own kids. But my parents aren’t perfect either. They also have flaws and sometimes they make decisions that I don’t necessarily agree with. Often I am in awe of their wisdom and love and then there are times when I think they’re being irrational or irresponsible or sometimes even childish. But their flaws do not by any means diminish or affect how much I love them. I get frustrated, upset and disappointed too but I think every child feels that way about their parents once in awhile.

I don’t think… I KNOW how much my parents love me and my brothers. It is evident in everything they do. Safe to say, their world revolves around us three kids. When I reflect on the many sacrifices our parents have endured for our sake, I am left feeling overwhelmed and sometimes embarrassed that I am not always able to return the favor.

Needless to say, I am very blessed to have such loving parents. Even when I don't always understand their reasons for the things they do, I trust that they are doing the best they can and with our welfare in mind.

I can only hope that others are as fortunate as me and if not, I hope that we all strive to become good parents someday to our own children.

Some guys deserve a break.

Sometimes when I am sitting in the train or the bus, I’ll see an old guy, a bit ruffled but dressed decently, carrying a bag or a sack, and he looks beaten and exhausted and it makes me feel bad.

Parang kawawa naman. I don’t even know if I should feel sorry for the guy. I mean, he’s probably happy and content and maybe he just doesn’t look like it. But what if he isn’t happy? What if he’s struggling? What if he’s a nice guy with a really good heart, who’s worked hard his entire life and never got the break he deserves? What if he goes home to an empty apartment and he’s all alone? Or maybe he goes home to a nice little family and they’re just trying to pay the bills and feed the kids and make ends meet?

It’s sad to think that there are a lot of people out there who have such good hearts, who try their best to make a decent living and yet they struggle. It doesn’t seem fair that good people should suffer. It also doesn’t help that not everyone gets the same opportunities. Some people are not as fortunate as others and are forced to do what they can with what they’re given. Sumasama ang loob ko pag naiisip ko na may mga mababait na taong naghihirap samantala yung mga taong mapagsamantala yumayaman.

There are people who are born into poverty and broken families and not everyone is fortunate enough to get an education or even get the proper guidance they need. Heck, not everyone gets to eat 3 times a day! Yes, it’s true that there are some people who struggle because they choose not to help themselves. But there are also those who do everything they can and yet do not seem to get anywhere. Just the other day I saw a guy on the subway and he must’ve been over 60 yrs old and he looked like he was coming from work and he had a backpack with him and he was struggling to even put it on his back! Can you imagine what it must be like to be old and frail and still have to work to pay the bills? And what if he works in a labor-extensive job like a factory or a warehouse or something? I imagine it must be difficult and painful at times. The sad thing is, in the world we live in, we have to work to eat.

My family isn’t rich either and my parents are both working and so do I and my brother. When I see guys like that on the train, I can’t help but worry about my own family. I don’t want my dad to be old and still be working. My parents are getting older and they’re not as strong as they used to be. Mabagal na nga sila maglakad eh.

It makes me wish I could do something to make things better. I wish the world were perfect… that everyone had the same opportunities… that good people do not have to suffer or struggle or go to bed worrying about bills and where the next meal is coming from. I want to believe that hard work really pays off... that if you do your best and make the most out of every opportunity that comes, you’ll eventually get the break you deserve. I really hope that those guys I see on the train are happy and content and that they don’t have to struggle more than they should.

Post Hopping

Once in awhile, I click on links from various blogs and sites and end up on a stranger’s page. I like reading what other people have written… reading about what goes on in other people’s lives and what they think, worry, fear, love or dream about. It’s all so interesting.

It’s comforting to learn that someone else is going through the same joys and pains I go through and worries about the same crap that I do. It’s like getting to know people without really knowing them.

Have you ever wanted to be invisible just so you could spy on people? Well, reading blogs is kind-of like spying. Not necessarily in a bad way. It allows you to peek into someone else’s life minus all that relationship drama. You can choose to be involved or not. Pag ayaw mo na magbasa, eh di lipat ka na sa ibang website.

For a moment, you get to share someone else’s highs and lows. It’s easy to get caught up in it. I often find myself reading someone’s blog and it almost seems as if I know the person kahit di naman talaga. I empathize with them and when they are obviously distraught or upset or worried, I feel it too. I find myself being excited and giddy about someone falling in-love or having kids or getting a promotion or going on a trip. I laugh at the funny things that people write about. I feel sad when I read about losses and disappointments and heartbreak.

Different people of different ages, cultures, beliefs and personalities write. And in reading other people’s posts, I am all the more convinced that regardless of our differences, everyone goes through the same things. We all have accomplishments, we all fall in-love, we all complain about our jobs, we all have disappointments, we all have had our hearts broken, we all have problems, we all worry about the future, we all (in some degree) worship someone or something and we all generally want to be happy.

Every time I visit someone’s page, it’s like catching them in that moment in time. If they’re happy at that time, then I’ll find a happy post and when they’re sad or vulnerable, then I see a very emotional post. What might be true for today might not necessarily be true for tomorrow and that’s also part of the beauty of it because I get to see a person’s different sides and moods and how they try to cope with the different things they go through whether it is something good or bad.

In a way, visiting other people’s pages allow me to be a part of their lives or stories even if all it means is me reading a short and simple post. Like I said earlier, it all is very interesting.

Ups and Downs.

Just when you think that life is good...

That you are finally being rewarded for being a decent human being...

That you begin to think you're in heaven, floating among the angels...

Being completely and utterly satisfied...

And that good things do happen to good people....

Life suddenly turns around, gives you a good kick in the bum just to keep you in check and make sure you still know what it is like to be stuck on Earth anxious, worrisome and a bit miserable.

Ah life... sometimes you gotta love it and sometimes you just gotta bite the bullet.

Lack of Vertical Inches.

I’ve somewhat given up. I’ve accepted the fact that I am short and will always be short. They say women generally stop growing at the age of 26. Screw that, I think I stopped growing a long time ago and frankly, I’d really rather not grow if it means adding inches sideways rather than lengthwise.

I’m actually quite ok with the way I am. Yes, I do wish I was taller or well-toned and that my teeth, hair and skin were perfect but for the most part, I’m happy the way I am. I may not be perfect but who is? And I was made this way and it is what it is and I’m really thankful that I am otherwise healthy.

I just have to keep in mind that there will always be people who have more and people who have less than I. Sure, I complain about my height but you know what? There are a lot of women who are much shorter than me and it doesn’t seem to bother them so why should it bother me? When you really think about it, our physical aspects are really relative. I’m tall compared to one person and short compared to another. So really, I am both short and tall.

Maybe I’ll wear heels less and comfortable flats more.

Oldies Never Get Old.

I had been begging one of my co-workers to give me a copy of his mp3s and when I got really, really anxious, the poor guy got dragged to his desk and I basically stood there and forced him to burn me a CD. Hey, nothing beats free music.

I don’t know exactly how many songs there were in total but I transferred almost all of them on my iPod and I am now happily listening to them. Most of them were oldies (70s, 80s, 90s music) which I liked before and have totally forgotten about so I was happy that he gave me a copy. Do you notice that oldies music in essence never really gets old (the irony…lol)? I mean, do you ever get tired of James Ingram or Frank Sinatra or The Beatles or even Rod Stewart? Sure they’re old and these were songs my parents listened to but no matter how much time passes and new songs and artists come out, whenever I hear an oldie song, I can’t help but listen to the whole thing. It’s always good. My parents are right… the classics will always stay. When Linkin Park or Britney Spears or what-have-you have come and gone, you will still find yourself listening to the songs of the 70s, 80s, and 90s and will love them just as much.

Come & Follow Me.

There was a song we sang at church today and I didn't know the title at the time but I Googled it and found that it is entitled The Summons which goes...

Will you come and follow me if I but call your name?
Will you go where you don't know and never be the same?
Will you let my love be shown? Will you let my name be known,
will you let my life be grown in you and you in me?

Will you leave yourself behind if I but call your name?
Will you care for cruel and kind and never be the same?
Will you risk the hostile stare should your life attract or scare?
Will you let me answer prayer in you and you in me?

Will you let the blinded see if I but call your name?
Will you set the prisoners free and never be the same?
Will you kiss the leper clean and do such as this unseen,
and admit to what I mean in you and you in me?

Will you love the "you" you hide if I but call your name?
Will you quell the fear inside and never be the same?
Will you use the faith you've found to reshape the world around,
through my sight and touch and sound in you and you in me?

Lord your summons echoes true when you but call my name.
Let me turn and follow you and never be the same.
In Your company I'll go where Your love and footsteps show.
Thus I'll move and live and grow in you and you in me.

I love this song because of its message. Indeed it is difficult to leave oneself behind and trust God with everything. How often we forget that God created us to know, love and serve Him and share in His eternal glory and happiness. We get so distracted by the comforts that this world has to offer and we lose sight of why we are here in the first place.

The Gospel today was when Jesus called His disciples and it says that they immediately dropped what they were doing and followed Him. I always wonder what that exactly means... I wonder because "immediately dropping what they were doing" is not an easy thing to do. Imagine yourself going about your business, commuting to work or whatever and Jesus sees you and asks you to drop everything and follow Him. Mind you that you do not yet know (or maybe you do) Him and yet you are being asked to abandon what you are doing and just go. What would you do? Would you pick up your cellphone and make a few calls, arrange everything and then follow? Would you think that the man talking to you is crazy and ignore him?

I think most of us, if asked right now in this age and time, would hesitate and a million things would be running in our heads. Most would agree with me when I say we'd all probably hesitate because it's not an easy thing to do especially when you have to make a living and raise a family and pay bills and what-have-you and here's a guy like any other guy who in your eyes is a complete stranger asking you to do what is not "reasonable" in your mind. Ang hirap noh?

The call to serve God in our daily lives is not heard by many and it's not like the Bible times where they heard God's voice, saw and spoke to Jesus or saw visions in dreams. Nowadays, we have to pray and try to see the message hidden in our lives and the people we meet and the chances that come our way and try to determine what God is telling us and asking us to do which is not easy. It takes a lot of faith and determination to even figure things out.

When things don't go my way, I always wonder if God is trying to tell me something. I get discouraged and I doubt at times but at the end of the day I know He loves me and knows what is best even if I don't understand it at the moment. Sometimes you just gotta do what you gotta do and do your best and let God do the rest. Pa-minsan minsan you just have to say to yourself, "Bahala na si Lord..."