Rambling

Every morning when I am struggling to get our of bed and get ready for work, I tell myself that after work, I am going straight home to eat dinner and then go to bed really early. That way, I get plenty of sleep and feel refreshed the following day.

Yeah... that NEVER happens. I always end up staying late everytime and then kicking myself in the butt the following morning... it’s a horrible cycle. I am always so groggy in the mornings and I always feel tired.

I realize I complain about work a lot. More so lately since I’ve been feeling increasingly stressed and worn out. I wake up thinking about work, I go to work and stress about it all day, I write about work, I talk to everyone about work and at the end of the day when I’m about to go to bed, I am still thinking about it! People always tell me I care too much and that I should learn to just relax and let things slip once in a while. How the hell do I do that?! Is there a class on how not to care too much about your job like “Screw –It-I’m-Here-For-The-Money-And-That’s-It 101” that everyone else seemed to have attended? If there was one and I missed it, I would like to know where the hell I was because I sure needed it!

There’s a popular saying that goes, “Before you enter the house, make sure you leave your work at the door..” I used to think this was easy to do but now... well... I’m not so sure. It’s darn hard to not think about it especially since most of our time revolves around our jobs. It’s something we like to take pride in doing well and it’s what allows us to buy the things we need. Of course it is only rational that I’d care.

Sometimes I think to myself whether I still like what I’m doing or if it’s becoming detrimental to me. As much as I like most aspects of my job, I can’t help but feel like I ought to be doing something else. Sometimes I feel like I’m missing out on some career opportunity. Then there are times when I think that maybe I’m in the wrong field altogether... and that’s when I start freaking out a bit. It’s really bizarre sometimes.

I think that maybe it’s just a matter of growing... maybe with time, I’ll eventually learn to ease up a bit when it comes to my professional life.