I want.

It is times like these that I wish I had a lot of money.

With the season shifting towards warmer weather, I find myself in want of some new summer clothing. Do I necessarily need it? No. But do I want it? Yes.

It’s so hard to resist the urge to buy with the abundant display of all things new in stores. Every time I see something I like in a store, it’s like my brain automatically begins to list down every single reason as to why I should buy it… as if it is trying to justify why I should spend the money. And at some point I will catch myself going through the notions of picking it up and/or going to the dressing room and trying it. I keep having to remind myself of the many reasons why I am saving and I muster up every courage to walk out of the store without anything.

The other day, I found an issue of Elle magazine on top of our dining table. I wondered how it got there as I am the only member of the family that actually purchases fashion magazines. It turns out that it was given to my mom for free during a product promotion of some sort. After hearing where it came from, JR commented that he thought I was the one who bought it and he thought it was weird since I haven’t been buying magazines for a while now. I told him I don’t buy them anymore because…

• they’re a waste of money
• I always see something I like in them and I end up wanting to go shopping

So I decided to just stop purchasing them. I think the magazine industry has successfully lured me into buying them and the products they endorse.

You probably wonder why I even bother going to the mall to begin with. I don’t know either. I just like walking around the place, window shopping and just looking at things. In a way, it lets me unwind in a somewhat safe, public place. I’ve always liked walking around the mall. It must be some inherent trait I got from my dad (yes surprisingly not from my mom).He loves going to the mall too. The upside of spending a lot of time in malls? You end up knowing where to go when you need something and you know where to get it cheap. When I need a dress or a pair of jeans or shoes, I will look at all my options. I will literally go through every store to find something I really like and that doesn’t cost a fortune. I hate the thought of buying something only to find out later I could have bought something much better and cheaper if only I had bothered to look at a few more stores.

Bottom line is, it really is hard to save especially when you want so many things. But I have to say, it really feels good to know I have money saved in the bank.