s-l-e-e-p

Why is it I start posting whenever I feel so damn sleepy? It either turns out to be a crappy post or a whiny one.

I realized I had forgotten to greet some people during the holidays and felt bad about it so I decided to write them today (well, it isn't completely over isn't it?) I'm trying to improve my keeping-in-touch skills. Jerry does it so well. He still keeps in touch with people he knew back when he was a boy and he regularly calls people he knows from Europe and Africa and just everywhere. He's amazing isn't he? I love my friends so much but I have to admit I'm bad at regular phone calls and e-mails. Since I don't want to grow old and look back and tell myself I should've made more calls and written more letters, I'm going to do my best to let the people who are important to me know I think about them.

Darn it, my week off is almost over. One more day and I'm back at work. Doesn't it sometimes seem like weekdays take forever but when you're on vacation time flies? Arrgghhh! But like my mom said, atleast we had a week off... a week off is better than nothing.

Jerry and I saw A Night At The Museum and Rocky the other night. Both movies were good and we didn't even have to pay because I had free movie passes for 2. We were lucky because A Night At The Museum was showing on IMAX and it was the first time for me. We were already sitting at the back and the screen still looked so huge it made it hard for me to focus. I was impressed (I'm easily fascinated anyway). I think I'm going to buy the DVD for A Night At The Museum when it comes out. It's the kid in me that wants to buy it. Note to self: buy DVD for The Emperor's New Groove! Man, I keep forgetting.

I think I need to get some s-l-e-e-p.

at work in the middle of the holiday season

I can’t believe Christmas is already over. Everything just goes by in such a blur. I always feel sad right after Christmas… it just seems like such a long time until the next one!

So here I am, sitting at my desk at work doing nothing (except for this, checking e-mails, and Friendster). I still can’t believe I have to work today…it just ruins the holiday mood.

I am so sleepy right now

I honestly feel like crawling under my desk to take a nap.I shouldn’t even be here since I don’t have anything to do.

The party at the Jacobs’ was fun! Too bad Jerry had to go home a bit earlier than me to catch the train home. It was the first time I played Taboo and I loved it so much that now I’m thinking of getting it for myself. I looovvveee playing boardgames! Jerry seems to love them too. In fact, we recently bought Monopoly and we’ve been playing it for several days now. It’s been such a long time since I last played Monopoly and it brings back fun memories from my childhood.

I’m dying to get paid. I’m so broke right now and I need to do a bit of shopping. I should feel bad about being broke and all but I don’t because it felt good to spend for other people.

I saw the preview for a scary movie that’s about to come out (sorry, I can’t remember the title). I knew I should’ve looked away as soon as the preview came on but my curiousity got the better of me and I ended up watching the whole thing which only lasted a few seconds but enough to give me the creeps. I woke up this morning and it was still dark and I was the only one up and I started thinking about that damn preview and successfully managed to scare myself. Good thing Jerry called and I asked him if it was ok if he stayed on the line until I finished getting ready for work. Silly, I know, but I feel better that way. This is why I hate watching scary movies.

just words

I feel so tired! The funny thing is, instead of getting some much needed rest, here I am writing. I don't even have anything in mind that I particularly wanted to discuss. I just felt like it.

Jerry's been working a lot lately. I feel bad for him because he's been exhausted these past week and he spends half his lunch time eating and half napping. Sometimes I have to remind him to eat! I won't be surprised if he starts losing weight.

I'm almost off on Christmas break! Yey!

I wonder what other people are doing at this exact same moment.

I missed Grey's Anatomy today. I can't believe I completely forgot about it! I figured I can always check YouTube or some website...hopefully they have it and I can just watch it off the internet. I was thinking of buying the Grey's Anatomy dvds but I haven't decided yet whether I should really spend money on it. The only TV series dvds that I've bought are those of Meteor Garden and Endless Love Story (hahaha! I know, I'm so cheesy!) but I loved watching them so much that I felt compelled to buy them.

I'm so glad the weather's been nice to us lately. It's amazing that the temperature is still above 0 degrees at this time of the year when it should be well below 0. I know I should be concerned about the environment and global warming and I am....but I'm still glad I don't have to stand outside in the immense cold.

Ah...Paper Bags!

I have this weird habit of keeping paper bags. I don't know why but I feel like it's such a waste of paper if I throw it away so I keep every single one of them thinking that I will use them someday. They also look so beautiful most of the time so I feel the need to keep them all the more.

Jerry of course tells me its useless and that they're meant to be thrown the moment I take stuff out of them. Maybe they are... but I'll keep them anyway.

Why am I even talking about paper bags? Because I was looking around my room last night and just realized I've got tons of them! I think I went overboard with the paper bag keeping.

Today

Christmas is just around the corner! How fast is that?! It seems yesterday I was telling myself Christmas is still a few weeks away and then everything went by in such a blur! Jerry and I have found ourselves scrambling for some last minute Christmas shopping.

Today I checked my e-mail and was surprised to find 2 e-mails from one of my professors from college. Both e-mails were e-cards he sent me and I felt bad for not checking my yahoo e-mail more often. I could've replied sooner. It's funny because I am closer to him now than I was back then during college. Although we don't write often, we try our best to keep each other posted.

I thought this week would be fairly easy at work since it's getting closer to the holidays but I was wrong. I've been swamped since the beginning of the week and I feel so tired at the end of the day that I always fall asleep on the train home. I haven't been listening to my iPod on the train because lately I've had several occasions where I almost missed my stop. I would fall asleep and because I had music on, I couldn't hear the driver announce the stops. So, I thought maybe if I don't listen to music, it would lessen the probability of me missing me stop. LOL...

I've been looking at e-cards and found some really cute ones. I almost feel like adding an e-card to my page as a widget. It would look silly though and I don't even know how to add it yet. I would surely miss the Christmas decorations I've added to this page.

Since Christmas is fast approaching, I decided to give myself a treat my getting my nails done. It's not often I would get them done but today I felt like it and so I went. I don't know why but it sure took forever for it to dry and when I tried to wear my coat, I accidentally caught a nail and let's just say one of my nails are a bit ruined. So much for getting my nails done and ruining it right before I even leave the place. Such is the life of a Ms. Anna Karina.

I was thinking of buying a new phone but it's a bit impractical right now so I've decided to wait on it until I have some spare cash. My phone still works anyway and although it's not the best phone out there, it still does what I need it to do.

I got home today and JR went in my room to tell me Miguel ate the chips I bought for work. Instead of being angry, I found myself laughing. You see, I already expected it to happen. So the way the story goes is that Miguel was looking for a snack and JR told him to grab food from the kitchen. Miguel then sees the bag of potato chips I bought specifically to bring to work for our 'thing' on Friday. Miguel opens the bag, eats the chips and even finds the dip that I also bought. Daddy arrives home from work and asks Miguel what he had for snacks. Miguel tells daddy he ate the chips he found together with the dip. Mommy overhears Miguel tell daddy he ate the chips with the dip and mommy then says, "hala, maybe he ate the chips Karen bought for work!" Of course he did! So Miguel then blames JR for telling him to look for a snack in the kitchen. Brothers!

a time without video games

Do you remember a time when video games weren't part of every household yet? I sure do.

When I was a kid, I went outside every afternoon to play with other kids. I knew all the games and I got really good at playing some of them after awhile. I remember my dad buying JR and I our first Nintendo but at that time, Nintendo was still pretty new and we thought it was so expensive back then. Eventhough we had our Nintendo, we still went outside every afternoon to play and we'd only start playing video games after dinner. Around the time Miguel was born, video games were becoming increasingly popular and so were PCs. I think I was 11 years old when my parents bought our first computer at home. Even then, PCs weren't part of every household and we thought only the rich had internet. Of course PCs became increasingly popular and soon enough almost everyone I knew in school had one at home and ICQ was the "in" thing. I remember having an ICQ number as a piece of identification as opposed to having a username. It used to bug me because I kept forgetting my friends' ICQ numbers and always found myself writing them down somewhere. After ICQ, Mirc became popular and eventually we were introduced to YM. When I think about it, I still can't believe how amazingly fast it grew in popularity. In a span of only a few years, the internet became so big and now almost everyone has access to it and you can find almost anything on the net. Now, I can't even imagine life without the internet let alone a PC.

Anyhow, back to what I was originally saying (sorry, got a bit sidetracked there), when Miguel was still young, we used to worry that he wasn't interacting with other kids so much because he was always in front of the computer if not the TV. My parents used to worry that he wasn't developing his social skills. Sure, he would go out to play but not as much as JR and I used to. He would only play outside when he felt like it but most of the time he'd rather go online and play. He turned out ok but sometimes I still wonder whether he had the sort of childhood JR and I had. I wonder what comes to his mind when he thinks about his childhood.

I hope no matter how popular video games are and no matter how "real" the games may seem, that children still go out to play with their friends. There are so many things to learn and discover between friends through different activities. Even though people can talk over the internet while they play RPGs, it's still different compared to having the person right there in front of you.

I must admit that I love paying online games too but nothing beats spending quality time with a friend.

Mission Accomplished!

Karen:

I know it’s your job to teach us how to use the system, but I still wanted to say thank you for all of your help today. You covered a lot of information, you were accommodating whenever we had questions, and you were very friendly. It was a pleasure to have you as an instructor, and I hope that you enjoy the rest of your holiday season.

I received this e-mail from a client I trained... it sure makes it all worth while.

Romantic Movies

I've decided to take a break from watching Love Story in Harvard. I've lost considerable amout of sleep watching episodes of it and each episode is almost an hour long. Believe it or not, I'm still only at episode 9. I've actually skipped parts of it because I wanted to jump ahead to the "sweet" parts - you know, the part where they first kiss and all that jazz. I'm such a sucker for romantic films. They're my feel good movies aside from watching cartoons. Just because they're not too realistic doesn't mean I can't enjoy them. It's nice to believe that there's still magic in this world and that people fall in love everyday and do crazy things for love.

Among all the romantic films I love watching, I must say I never get tired of watching Notting Hill, While You Were Sleeping and 50 First Dates. I love watching these because they never fail to make me laugh and feel good. The first time I watched 50 First Dates I cried in the theater. I don't even know why... I think it just touched me (Gee, I sound so cheesy don't I?)

I also love watching the classic Sabrina which stars Julia Ormond, Harrison Ford and Greg Kinnear. My brothers hate me when I watch this over and over again which gives me all the more reason to watch it. -evil grin-

If there's a romantic movie in the theaters, I almost always want to go see it.

Thank You Father

I just want to say God is good and has blessed me in so many ways. To thank Him is the least I can do. I will not elaborate further but everyday I realize how blessed I truly am.

little things

I've been looking for Paula Deanda's song Easy feat. Lil Wayne and was beginning to get impatient since it's almost close to impossible finding it. But because I believe in the classic line that nothing is impossible, I just couldn't get myself to give up. I finally found a decent copy and am very pleased with myself for all my efforts. -grin-

I've been trying to look at the music charts at RX 93.9 but it seems their chart page is down. Bummer.

Did a bit of holiday shopping over the weekend and a day after payday I find myself a wee bit broke. I would complain but it was all worth it. I am also proud to say I didn't spend too much for myself. In fact, I only bought myself a small inexpensive present and the rest went to buying stuff for others. (Karen = 1 , Shopaholic = 0).

I managed to get in bed by 10pm last night. I thought to myself, "finally, I can get 8 hours of sleep and not feel tired tomorrow at work..." then I found myslef turning in bed, forcing myself to sleep. What's worse, I woke up early this morning... way to early. So, when I think about it, was it really worth all that trouble?

The boss finally moved to LA and I got her office. Part of me is pleased but a greater part of me feels remorse. why? Because I feel lonely in that office! No Steve to talk to, I can't bug the tech guys and I miss out on all the office gossip. Not only that but every person that passes can see what I'm doing on my computer (I tried to move the desk around only to find that it's screwed together and I've got no choice but to have my PC face the glass wall.) I also feel bad because I don't want people to feel awkward around me just because I got a room with a door. I really don't care whether I have an office or not. I was quite content where I was before and the only reason I was asked to move was so that I could close the door when I'm training and it would be quiet.

As soon as I got to work this morning, the very first thing I did was walk all the way to the back and check if Steve's back from vacation. I was grinning ear-to-ear when I saw his jacket slung over his chair. I immediately put my stuff down on my desk and set out to look for him. Too bad he was sitting with the managers so I had to wait until he was through before I could talk to him. As soon as he came out of there, I just HAD to hug him. I was so glad to have my partner-in-crime back. Without him there, I have no one to talk to...plus I was tired of worrying about where I'm going to go for lunch (since our office is conveniently located in the middle of nowhere).

And here I thought...

I was a very curious child. Everytime my parents took me out, I asked an awful lot of questions. Questions like, “why is the sky blue during the day and black at night?” or “how do cars run?” or “where do babies come from?” or “why can’t I touch the stars?” or “How do the chickens know it’s already morning?” My parents tried their best to answer all of my questions and when my questions required answers that were very hard to explain to a child, my dad’s common response was, “It’s very hard for you to understand even if I try and explain it to you because you’re still young. But you will learn a lot of things in school and as you grow older.” So, I went to school everyday thinking that I would get all my answers. But in the meantime, I had my theories and my so-called “childhood myths”.

I thought…

• Babies were put in mommies’ tummies while they sleep. I couldn’t figure out how though…
  
• My real mommy had been turned into an orange ball and the mommy who’s at work is mommy’s twin sister and daddy thinks it’s my mommy. The orange ball might be in daddy’s cabinet...fake mommy put it there. (This was a dream that I thought was real… I think it was influenced by some TV show our maid used to watch)
  
• There are people inside the TV but they’re small so they fit.
  
• Clouds were made of cotton. You can bounce on them, sleep in them and never hurt yourself. God and the angels live in the clouds but they hide everytime a plane passes by so we never see them.
  
• Being an angel was a profession. I wanted to be one when I grew up.
  
• All toys come alive at night when I’m sleeping or when I’m not looking. If I’m cruel to them, they will hurt me.
  
• Dogs won’t bite you if you bite your tongue because they feel the pain too (blame my childhood friend for teaching me this.)
  
• Holy water heals wounds faster because it’s holy (again, blame childhood friend for this.)
  
• You grow up and you marry your next door neighbor. That’s how people find their husbands and wives. Daddy married mommy and they were neighbors.
  
• The sky is blue because God colored it blue just like He colored the plants green. Daddy said the sky is blue because of something called gases… I don’t understand.
  
• Those scary looking plants in school used to be children but the plants did something to them and now they’re horrible. I should never be left alone with these plants.
  
• Rainbows are really big colorful slides. I just haven’t figured out yet how to get on them.
  
• Unicorns, mermaids and Santa exist. I’ve never seen them in person but that’s because they’re magical.
  
• I can fly but I have to jump off somewhere high like the roof.
  
• I’m really a princess and my dad’s the king and my mom’s the queen. They’re just hiding it so I won’t get kidnapped.
  
• Daddy and mommy said my cousins moved to another country but the truth is, they’re just hiding and they’re watching me. I don’t know why they would hide though…
  
• If I drink Nestea, I can fall flat on my back and there’ll be water… just like in the TV commercial.
  
• Big Bird and Snuffleupagus were real.
  
• Dinosaurs are still alive. They just don’t know where to find them.
  
• Frog piss gives you boils and butterfly powder makes you go blind.
  
• If you swallow a seed, it will grow into a plant inside of you.
  
• If you have an open wound, everything you eat will come out of it.

I still believe 2 of the items listed… LOL!

Run! Fifi is screaming!

I have Fifi for a few minutes. Fifi is our cordless reception phone… so when you call our office and dial 0, Fifi starts screaming. No one likes Fifi. In fact, someone attempted to destroy Fifi and succeeded so we had to buy a new phone w/c looks, screams and functions exactly like Fifi. In fact, I think they secretly cloned Fifi and just didn’t bother changing her name. I don’t even know why she’s called Fifi. In fact, nobody knows why.

New Fifi is better than old Fifi. New Fifi doesn’t scream too loud. It’s tolerable...still annoying.. but tolerable. New Fifi actually allows you to have a decent conversation with the person on the other end of the line instead of just static. Also, reduces the chances of you “accidentally” hanging up.

So back to what I was saying, I was left in charge of Fifi while H goes out to pay some bills and grab us lunch. Not very happy that I have Fifi with me. Thankfully, she hasn’t been screaming since I got her. I would leave it with someone else if only someone would take her. Of course, at the sight of you handing Fifi over to them, they start running the opposite direction or utter stupid excuses. I can’t blame them though...I would do the same if I could but I’m too weak… I almost always accept Fifi and end up regretting it later on.

I need to make a phone call to a client but I’m afraid that once I’m on the phone, Fifi will start screaming.

Almost late because of a Korean Drama

Mid-week…almost Friday but not quite…

I was so tired yesterday that I fell asleep on the train home. I didn’t even realize we were already at Kennedy station and a guy had to wake me up. It was so embarrassing! Jerry says I must’ve been really tired and to be honest, I was… I just didn’t realize how much until I sat down on the train.

Steve still isn’t back yet from his vacation and I can’t remember when he’s supposed to be back. We’re thinking of getting him a Christmas present to say thank you for all the cooking and grocery shopping he’s done for the company. He’s currently on a cruise with 20 other people and how I wish I could go on a cruise too! I’m eligible for 2 weeks vacation time in a year but I only took a week off this year. I probably should’ve used the full 2 weeks since it doesn’t get carried over to the following year anyway. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

A friend told me I should see Love Story in Harvard. It’s a Korean drama they showed in the Phils and dubbed in Filipino and it’s supposed to be good. So I decided to Google it and find out more then I went on YouTube hoping to catch maybe a few episodes just to see what the fuss was all about. To my surprise, they have almost all the episodes… some dubbed in Filipino while others had English subtitles (a big thank you to those people patient enough to upload all these videos). Last night I watched several episodes for several hours and I liked it. I still think Winter Sonata and Endless Love were better but Love Story in Harvard isn’t bad (ya, I know I could stoned for admitting I love watching Korean Dramas… baduy na kung baduy.. but they’re so well done and unlike the Western or Filipino dramas, they’re much shorter so you don’t feel like they put so much stuff in it to the point where it’s tiring).

This morning I decided to watch one episode before leaving the house… bad idea. I was almost late for work! I literally had to run to catch the bus and I was lucky because the TTC driver was patient enough to wait for me.

Yum!

3/4 cup butter or margarine
1 cup brown sugar
1-3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1-1/2 cups oatmeal
1-1/2 cups mango jam

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees Farenheit.
2. Mix butter, sugar, flour, baking soda, and oatmeal in a bowl. Blend well using your hands. Press half of mixture onto a 13-by-9-inch rectangular pan.
3. Spread mango jam on top of crust.
4. Sprinkle the remaining half of the mixture on top of jam.
5. Bake for 35 minutes or until golden.
6. Cool and cut into squares.

Chef’s Tips: You can also use strawberry jam, pineapple jam, guava jelly, langka jam, or orange marmalade instead of mango jam.

I found this recipe on a website and it looks so yummy! I will give this a try one day...

Cooking and I

In case you didn’t know, I can’t cook. I mean, I can but I’m not very good at it. I can probably cook an estimated 10 dishes or less and that’s about it. I used to brush it off like I didn’t need to learn how to cook because I figured I’ll survive (somehow). I grew up with a maid to do all the cooking in the house so I didn’t feel the need for it as much as I do now.

Now, I’m in my early twenties and I really feel the need to be good at it (especially since I have a BF who insists on me learning and being a good cook). No more maids to do the cooking and sooner or later I will have to cook for myself and my family. My great aunt was kind enough to lend me some of her recipes which I wrote down in a notebook and brought with me. I just need some hands-on practice and I know I’ll eventually be able to do it really well. I just have to get over the fear of being burned. Have you ever seen me cook? There’s a very obvious distance between me and the stove.

Jerry’s been pushing me to cook… oh sorry babe, I meant to say “encouraging” me. LOL! And so far, I have managed to cook him 3 different dishes all by myself. –GRIN- I’ve been looking at recipes I come across in magazines and websites but maybe I’m getting ahead of myself here. I should probably start with the basics… learn how to cook the dishes my mom and grandma prepares at home. My dad has always hoped I’d be a great cook but I think it’s my brother Miguel who is more keen on it than me. The other day Miguel said he wanted to become a chef someday. I don’t have to be a chef… I don’t want to be one either… I just really need to learn how to cook good food!

My name is Karen and I'm a sleepaholic

Last week I was complaining about my lack of sleep so the weekend that went by I slept and slept and slept…as much as I wanted to. While Jerry calls it “being lazy”, I call it “resting”. If there’s such a thing as a sleepaholic, that would be me. I can sleep for 12 hours straight if I wanted to but I’d probably get up with a bad back. You don’t appreciate sleep until you go several days without it. I make it a point to sleep-in atleast a day of the week. It always feels good to just rest. When I’m asleep, everything feels right in the world... I feel at peace.

I can sleep almost anywhere – the couch, my parents’ or brothers’ bedroom, on the floor (provided there’s a mat of course), on the train, on the bus – as long as I can lean my head on something. But I can’t sleep while standing… that’s just weird. I did see a guy once on the train standing and sleeping at the same time. I was just waiting for him to fall… it would’ve been pretty funny.

The only downside of sleeping a lot? Obviously, you don’t accomplish anything and the day goes by so fast.

Listening to Magic 89.9

I am such a sentimental fool. I'm currently tuned in to Magic 89.9 in the Phils. It's one of my fave radio stations from home. It's so weird, I'm listening to music playing in my country half-way around the world and it makes me feel... almost like crying. I miss home so much.

Ohhh.. here comes the traffic update.. haha.. traffic is so bad there like ALWAYS that I'm almost suprised when there's no traffic. One advantage of being stuck in traffic? It's when you're in the car with someone you love spending time with.. you get to talk and talk and talk while you're in the middle of the road. haha! This also gives you an oppurtunity to sleep while travelling. And if you're on your way to school, you get some "study" time.

It's weird, the DJ's keep saying, "today Dec. 9th..." and it's only Dec 8th here. It's already past noon there on a saturday. The malls must be packed! Oh how I hate the pushing and the long lines. Oh this one is a good song.. I wonder who's singing. I'll have to download this song.

Oooh they're playing The Remedy by Jason Mraz.. I love this song. It's old but it's still nice. I like how they play a new song and then alternate it with some old hits.

It's getting late.. I better get ready for bed... ok, a few more songs!

Pandora

A couple of my co-workers and I were talking about file sharing programs and one of them mentioned Pandora. It's a website that allows you to search for a song/artist you like and it creates a play list with songs that are similar to the one you specified and it streams it so you play it like a radio.

I tried it and I really like it...

http://www.pandora.com/

Whenever I come across applications I can't help but wonder how they made it, what they used to make it and how long it took to make it. I must say I'm pretty impressed.

Freezin'

I hate those people in Calgary enjoying the 7-degree temperature while we freeze our butts of here in Toronto with -6 degrees (and wind chill that makes it seem like -13 degrees).

I left work at 5pm with a bad headache and much needed sleep. I got on the subway with every intention of sleeping all the way and that's exactly what I did. Mind you, I almost missed my stop and by some miracle I woke up just in time.

Did I tell you they blocked the doors leading out to the 116 bus stop? Very annoying. There's nothing wrong with the doors (from what it looks like) so I don't see why they need to put the police lines there. Now, everyone has to pass through the 86 door to get to the 116 stop and I don't even want to talk about how horrible it is during rush hours.

Anyhow, so we had to walk in the cold today with mom, dad, JR and Miguel. We were going to church and maann was it cold! By the time we got to church, I could no longer feel my fingers, nose and ears. It literally felt like my ears were going to fall off. I was so glad to get inside where it's warm. Canada is horrible like that, so warm in the summer and so cold in the winter. Extremes!

Did I tell you I hate those people in Calgary enjoying 7 degree temperature?

What Mythological Creature Are You?

Found this one on a stranger's blog and since I have a lot of time on my hands this morning, I decided to take it just for the heck of it..LOL

See, I told you I'm an angel... REALLY.

Aren't I glad I'm only 17% demon and 17% warewolf? I wonder what makes up a mermaid... hmmm...



You scored as an Angel.

Angel: Angels are the guardians of all things, from the smallest ant to the tallest tree. They give inspiration, love, hope, and positive emotion. They live among humans without being seen. They are the good in all things, and if you feel alone, don't fear. They are always watching. Often times they merely stand by, whispering into the ears of those who feel lost. They would love nothing more then to reveal themselves, but in today's society, this would bring havoc and many unneeded questions. Give thanks to all things beautiful, for you are an Angel.

Angel		84%
Mermaid		67%
Faerie		59%
Dragon		25%
WereWolf		17%
Demon		17%

What Mythological Creature are you? (Cool Pics!)
created with QuizFarm.com

Ikaw Talaga...

This morning has been the coldest so far for this winter season. It’s only still fall but for me it’s all the same. It’s still cold. The only time it’s ever warm is during the summer. Boy, how I love summer. You can’t blame me, I’m Filipino. I grew up in warm weather where I could go swimming whenever I want to except on days when it’s raining.

I’m so glad I don’t have to train today. The only thing is, my work day goes by so much slower. But still, I’m glad I don’t have to train.

This morning I got to work and turned my PC on and guess who was online? Juhl! I haven’t spoken to him in such a long time that when I do get the chance to chat with him, I jump with joy. He was still at work – about to leave – while I’m only starting my day. He’s such a sweetheart. One of my very best buddies! As usual, we get into this whole joking mood where we just kid each other around until one of us gets pissed off or gives up. He just says the craziest things and I can’t help but laugh. If I were in the Phils, I’d be in so much trouble because of him. I remember that time we went to Splash Island and we stopped by the convenience store at Shell (I think?) to buy some snacks and while we were waiting in line, he turned to me and in a very loud voice said, “Ate, ate, anu yun? FHM? Anu yun o ate, S-E-X… anu yun ate?”(for those who don’t understand Filipino, he basically said, “sister, what’s that? FHM? What’s that S-E-X? what is that sister?” – ok, this doesn’t sound too well when translated in English but what the heck..LOL…) AAARRRGG! I turned bright red because the store was packed and everyone was glancing our way!! It was so embarrassing. He was doing it on purpose to embarrass me! All I could say was, “baliw ka talaga Juhl…gagu”. And he was just standing there laughing... LAUGHING his head off!

This is the guy that calls me late at night just because he’s bored and couldn’t sleep or because he needs to talk about his dates. You'd think he'd be nicer but noooo! He just has to get me every time.

He’s going to the US next year for a project for work and I really hope I get to see him. I really want him to meet Jerry.

Moving Forward

At least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward...

I stand before, a road that will lead,
into the unknown. At least unknown to me.
I want to go, but I'm paralysed with fear.
Fear of a choise, where the outcome isn't clear.

Nooo, but still I gooo.

And I take, the first step of a million more.
And I'll make mistakes I've never made before.
But at least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward...

I wonder if, the journey will be,
Shorter as I hope, or much longer than it seems.
But either way, I've made up my mind.
I'm through feeling scared, I'm leaving that behind.

Sooo, Now it's time to gooo.

And I take, the first step of a million more.
And I'll make mistakes I've never made before.
But at least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward...

And in while I''l be singing,

Na, nana nana

And I take, the first step of a million more.
And I'll make mistakes I've never made before.
But at least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.

And I take, the first step of a million more!
And I'll make mistakes I've never made before!
But at least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward.
At least I'm moving forward, at least I'm moving forward!

Mo-ving, for-ward.
Mo-ving, for-ward.
Mo-ving, for-ward.
Mo-ving, for-ward...

Na, nana nana

Moving Forward

Hoobastank

It's that time to be sentimental again...

Today I was asked by a co-worker if my family celebrates Christmas. It's funny, sometimes I feel like no one else celebrates Christmas like Filipinos do. As soon as the "ber" months roll in, we go gaga over Christmas songs, gifts, decorations, and every single thing that has to do with the holidays. We even have the "Countdown till Christmas".

I remember my parents taking my brothers and I for a drive around Ayala every year to look at the Christmas lights. I also remember the annual fireworks at ATC. There is a house in BF Parañaque that we try to visit every year to look at its Christmas lights. Cars stop by it everytime. The entire house is decorated with lights including the gates, trees and the fruits on the trees. It is so well-done that you can't help but think that the owner probably hires a decorator to do it (I can only imagine how much his electric bill is). We tried taking pictures of it but it's too bright that the pictures just turn out overexposed.

I miss Christmas caroling which officially begins on the 16th of Dec, I miss seeing people go to Simbang Gabi at 4am in the morning and puto bung bong (did I spell it right?). I miss the kids going from house to house on Christmas day asking for aguinaldo. I miss the cool Christmas mornings. Not cold, just cool. Suprisingly, I even miss the crowded malls where everyone is just busy shopping for gifts and groceries. I miss the Christmas parties at school.

You know what I miss the most? I miss spending Christmas with relatives. I miss the phone calls on Christmas eve (when everyone is trying to make a phone call and all the telephone systems are too busy you can't even make a call.) I miss the exchanging of gifts in my grandma's house. I miss putting up our "ancient" Christmas tree (the one we've had since forever). I miss our Christmas Wreath (which survived the many years) and I miss our old Christmas Tree decorations (each year we lose a ball or two). I miss having lunch at my grandma's house and talking to my cousins, aunts and uncles and playing games.

I've had 2 Christmases here in Canada and it's been good so far. But there is nothing like spending Christmas at the place you grew up in. Nothing can replace old Christmas traditions. It will always have a special place in my heart - tucked away along with all my best memories. And here in Canada, I will make new good memories with my family and my friends here and I will have phone conversations and Christmas greetings with the people I love from home.

Be grateful, enjoy it.

Ah..here I am again, listening to a song that brings back good memories. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and enjoy it once more. Kinda like going back to the good times and living it again. It's funny how much we take for granted and later do we look back and wish...wish that we had treasured that moment more, enjoyed it to the fullest. And sometimes we wish we had the ability to prolong the moment, to hold it in the palm of our hands and never let go.

But life isn't like that. Time doesn't stand still. The best we can do is to enjoy it as it comes and look forward to having more of it. True, life doesn't always bring us happiness. But each sadness, each hurt we encounter only strengthens our desire for happiness. It helps us recognize the good times from the bad, be grateful for our blessings and it keeps us hoping... hoping for more good times.

We need to learn to be grateful for every reason to smile.

If you knew when

On an episode of Grey's Anatomy, Meredith asks:

"What would you do if you knew this was the last day of your life? "

Do you ever find yourself lying in bed at night pondering on this question? I do. As much as I would love to meet God one day, I can't help but wonder if I would do things differently, look at the world differently, and just see life differently if I knew when I was going to go.

Maybe some things I would do differently and maybe not. All I know is, when that time comes, I want to be able to look back at my life and smile.

Crazy enough to go?

Busy, busy, busy. There are days when I feel like I go to work to do nothing and then there are days when I’m so busy I barely have time to eat. It’s so weird…

The other day Jerry and I were watching TV when the ad for the Amazing Race came on. He suddenly turned to me and said, “We should do that… I think we’d do well…” and I replied with a, “Uh huh… you really think so? I think there’s a high chance you might have to carry me several times…”

I don’t watch it on a regular basis. Ok, more like, I only watched a total of 5 episodes of all the Amazing Race shows (my apologies to the avid fans out there.) I used to follow Survivor but got tired of it after awhile (again, my apologies to the avid fans out there). On those rare occasions when I did watch some episodes, I did think of what it would be like if I was on it.

If I were on Survivor, these are the things that could possibly happen to me:

- die of hunger
- get seriously hurt trying to do a stunt
- get seriously hurt trying to find something to eat
- cry like a baby
- get into a catfight (not very likely but I could get very upset and start a fight)
- embarass myself in front of millions of people by doing/saying something stupid on TV
- get eliminated (and I can think of several reasons why)

and if I were on The Amazing Race, these are the things that could possibly happen:

- die of exhaustion
- get extremely cranky due to exhaustion
- cry like a baby
- get into a big fight with my partner over something very stupid
- get into a big fight with my partner over something that's not stupid
- get into a fight with another couple
- embarass myself in front of fmillions of people by doing/saying something stupid on TV
- get eliminated

The way I see it, I'm doomed either way.

But knowing myself, I can't help but wonder... I mean after all, I have done some pretty amazing things in my life. Nothing major or overly big but I have been able to survive highschool and university (and we all know how challenging that can be...or maybe not), I've managed to embarass myself and survived, I've gotten into fights (nothing big either) but I survived, I've had my share of sleepless nights and survived, I've gotten hurt (both physically and emotionally) and survived, I've skipped meals before and I didn't die, I've found myself under pressure and high stress situations before and managed to keep my cool... so... with that said, I think that although my chances are pretty slim, I still have a fighting chance. No matter how small that may be.

I may not win but it it sure will be one hell of an experience right?

What if Jerry asked me to join? I'd probably be just crazy enough to actually go!

Cute Gift Idea!

I was browsing the femalenetwork.com blogs and saw this cute gift idea.

Kung Fu Kids Desk Collection. Put some fun into his work space. Tape dispenser, P1,440. Clock and card holder, P1,440. CD tray/mail holder, P1,230. Available at Hobbes and Landes (Alabang Town Center, Power Plant, Podium).

I would love to have one on my desk. It's supposed to be a "for him" kind of gift but it's still so cool!

Updates

I’ve decided to take Kristin’s advice and play around with the Fonts & colors option instead of looking for an entirely new template (since my last attempt completely screwed up my widgets!)I know, the one I chose is a strong color but I like it.

I’ve also added some stuff that I thought were cute (check out my christmas tree!) There are so many other things I wanted to add but maybe at a later time because I don’t want to over do it and make my page look over crowded.

So, I finally bought a wireless router and now I just have to figure out how to set it up. If it were me, I would have paid the Geek Squad to come to my house and install it since they have a promo going on for a particular router but dad said we don’t need it since we can probably figure it out ourselves. Of course this is easier said than done. Some guys from work have kindly offered to help me encrypt my router.

I got Jerry watching Heroes and Grey’s Anatomy as well. I find it very cute when he tells me we need to go home early on Thursday nights so we can catch the show.

Steve’s off on vacation which means I’m all alone in our little corner in the office. It also means we have to fend for ourselves during lunch break. No Steve to cook or take care of lunch for us. I just hope someone remembers to order in. LOL!

You Learn...

After awhile you learn
the subtle difference between
holding a hand and chaining a soul
and you learn that love doesn't mean possession
and company doesn't mean security.
And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts
and presents aren't promises and you begin to accept
your defeats with your head up and your eyes ahead
with the grace of an adult not the grief of a child.
And you learn to build your roads today
because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans
and futures have ways of falling down in mid-flight.
After awhile you learn that even sunshine
burns if you get too much so you plant your
own garden and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure
that you really are strong
and you really do have worth
and you learn
and you learn...

Veronica A. Shoffstall

I messed up

Last night I attempted to change my template and by doing so I had accidentally deleted all of my widgets (it’s those items over to the right side of this page). I was confident I could change my template just to see what it would like and if I didn’t like it I could always revert it since I had a backup saved on my PC. Turns out the backup file does not contain a backup of the widgets. I don’t know why though. Anyhow, I was totally planning to going to bed before 10pm but because I messed up my page, I spent a lot of time trying to bring them back and eventually had to re-create them (very annoying if I may add). I ended up going to sleep at midnight and of course had difficulty getting out of bed this morning.

Crap Internet

Need wireless router. Internet is crappy. Cannot download music from iTunes. Cannot even install YM or MSN messenger. Can use windows messenger but keeps hanging and shutting itself down due to intermittent internet connection. Takes forever to load certain pages on certain websites.

In short, no internet = useless laptop.

Tired

I feel so tired. Blame it on my entire Sunday afternoon spent wacthing Grey’s Anatomy DVDs. I usually sleep on Sundays. It’s the one day of the week I try my best to devote to nothing but a day of relaxation and that means getting tons of sleep. =P

The Christmas party on Friday was ok. It wasn’t “all that” but it was ok. To be honest I would have rather gone to Jerry’s Christmas party if I had known my company Christmas party would be so “ordinary”. Thankfully, I had a great weekend and that makes up for Friday night. –grin-

I can’t believe how cold it’s gotten since last week. I know the temperature should have been in the negatives by mid November but this autumn was nice for me because it stayed above 0 degrees all the way until the last week. I got off the subway and saw snow on the ground. Where did that come from?! I don’t recall it snowing in Scarborough last night or this morning but it looks like it snowed downtown Toronto. I wore my high boots to work and I was worried I might slip and fall. It looks like it’s got a good enough grip on the pavement but I need to go shoe shopping again soon if I want to survive the winter. Bummer.

Once again it has been a few days after payday and I don’t know where my money went. Honestly, all I did was buy what I needed. I didn’t even shop for clothes, no new shoes, no accessories…nothing but the basics and yet I feel as if my money slipped right through my fingers. Arggh! And I still need to buy a new bath tub mat and a wireless router so I can finally make use of my laptop. This sucks.