Little Ones.

If there is one thing you must know about me is the fact that I love listening to parents. I love hearing about what it is like to be a parent – the joys and pains of it all and what it feels like to raise a child. Since I was young, I have always imagined kids in my life one day. I know for a fact that I would definitely want little ones of my own.

Being the eldest of three children, I gave my parents a lot of “firsts” and I love hearing about their pleasant surprises and not-so-pleasant surprises when they had me and when my brothers and I were growing up. My brothers and I are blessed to have such good parents who are never shy to tell us how they feel or felt at times and what makes them happy, their hopes and dreams for us and who never fail to show us how much they love us. Occasionally, during dinner, my parents would tell us about the little things they remember the most about us growing up.

My mom endured 14 hours of labor when she had me and that I refused to come out so the doctors had to use forceps. Meanwhile, my dad was outside in the waiting room and refusing to eat or do anything but wait. My dad always tells me how anxious, excited and worried he was all at the same time because he had no idea what was going on in the delivery room. Both my parents would tell us that seeing and holding us for the first time gave them a feeling beyond words. Sometimes I try to imagine what I would feel like when I meet my child for the first time… but truth be told, I can’t imagine what it must feel like. I guess it’s one of those things you just have to experience on your own to know.

Sometimes I worry. I worry that I might be incapable of having kids. I worry that I won’t raise them right… that I won’t know what to do.

I love listening to parents talk about their kids and I like reading about it on blogs too. There’s just something magical and truly touching when a parent talks about his/her child. They glow… and it shows just how proud they are and how much their kids mean to them. My mom once told me that there is nothing like a parent’s love for a child. Both mom and dad tell me that having a kid changes your life forever. That it changes you.

I can’t wait.

Dying for a bite.

I am craving for…

• Tokyo-tokyo
• A Brothers’ Burgers combo
• Squid Balls from Odd Balls
• Siomai and mami from Henlin
• Halo-halo
• Leche Flan
• Jollibee & Chowking
• Sisig
• Jamaican Patties
• Avocado shake from the Big Chill
• Ice Monster
• Indian Mangoes

I’m so hungry! There’s so many that I miss eating simply because they don’t have it here in Canada. Sometimes I daydream of going to the Philippines and just going for a massive food trip. I think if I ever went back for a vacation, I’d gain a lot of weight. Guaranteed!

I've been Tagged.

Instructions: Each player starts with 7 random facts/habits about themselves. People who are tagged need to write on their own blog about their seven things, as well as these rules.

At the end of your blog, you need to choose 7 people to get tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave them a comment telling them that they have been tagged and to read your blog!

1. I only drink coffee in the morning, only a cup (which I difficult to finish) and only when I’m at work.
2. I am an impulsive buyer.
3. I tend to remember most things I hear.
4. It takes a lot to get on my bad side but once you’re there, there’s no going back.
5. Sometimes I get scared at night so I leave my lights on all the way until morning and when my brothers or parents ask me why I left it on, I tell them I forgot to turn it off and fell asleep.
6. When I leave the house late in the morning, it’s mostly because I couldn’t decide on what to wear.
7. I probably only own about 2 pieces of clothing that’s purple.

I'm tagging: Bom, Kaye, Marieseda, Arlene, Steve, Suzy and Frank

Road Kill (almost!)

The other day, I was in the car with Steve and all of a sudden he stops and tells me there are raccoons crossing. And then I saw two little, furry creatures run across the road in front of the car. They were running so fast, I could barely make out what they were. If Steve hadn’t told me they were raccoons, I would have thought they were squirrels. So there we were watching and Steve says, “Look there’s another one on the side” and I turn to see a third raccoon hesitating by the side of the road and then it suddenly crossed. But there was an on-coming car and both Steve and I watched in horror as it ran across the road with the car running towards it. I was so sure it was going to get hit and with my voice raised, I kept saying, “Oh no! It’s going to get hit! Do something!”

Thank God the little thing didn’t get hit. It barely missed it though…

I think they were young raccoons because they were still small. I would have been devastated if it had gotten hit. And right in front me too.

News Blues.

If there’s one thing you probably don’t know about me (or maybe you do) is that I don’t follow the news as much as I ought to. When I was younger, I didn’t like reading the newspaper because the paper itself and all that ink (or whatever it was on it) always made my hands dirty and I didn’t always have a sink and soap handy to wash my hands with.

Putting shallowness aside, one of the primary reasons I don’t like following the news so much is that it always depresses me in one way or another. It’s almost feels like a constant reminder that the world is screwed up, that there are people out there that are completely messed up and that the people we trust to make things better end up making a bigger mess of things.

Doesn’t it make you sad to hear that thousands of lives are lost everyday because of war, poverty, crimes, etc? Such innocent people who are just trying to live decent lives become prey to such horrible circumstances that could have been prevented.

Maybe I’m looking at it the wrong way? Maybe the news not only tells us what happens around us…but maybe it’s also a call for change?

New Design (yikes!)

Darn. I just bumped into another person’s blog and it looks soooo nice. Now I want a new theme too. Yargh!

I don’t know what it is… I can’t seem to stick with one design. I keep getting bored and looking for bigger and better things to do with my page. It’s sick, I tell you, because it takes a LOT of time to make changes to a page and make it look and work exactly the way I want it too. This strong desire for change keeps me awake late at night working on my page and gives me headaches in turn. It makes it even more difficult when there’s a limited number of resources and the fact that I can be pretty picky.

I should probably just invest some time in creating my own designs. Maybe I could extra money that way?

Use deo for crying out loud.

We live in the 21st century. You would think people would atleast realize this fact and how far the human race has gone. Yet, it surprises me that some people don’t seem to know deodorant exists.

I don’t mean to be prissy but try sitting in the bus for a long time beside someone who seems to be oblivious to the fact that he/she isn’t so “fresh” anymore. In fact, he/she is so far from it.

If you really are so used to your “scent” and really might be oblivious, wouldn’t it be safe to just put deo on anyway just in case?

Season Finale

Last night was the finale of So You Think You Can Dance. I got home a little late and missed the first 30-40 minutes of the show. I regret not being able to watch the whole thing and I was hoping there would be a re-run of it somewhere. Of course I didn’t help that the TV’s broken and the picture was fuzzy but I was happy nonetheless to have seen it (even if I could barely make out the people’s faces). I was really pleased that the choreographers picked out their favorite dances and the contestants performed them again. I also loved the fact that they highlighted some of the best moments and even showed some of the auditions that stood out. If only I taped all of them… then I could just play it over and over.

In a way I am a bit sad that the season’s over. It’s the one show that had no over-the-roof drama. It was pure fun to watch and because I love dancing, it was really entertaining. I’m not particularly good at dancing so I have such great admiration for the contestants who truly have talent. I loved seeing all the different choreography and the different styles of dancing and I loved all those wow moves that just left you with your mouth wide open (remember that move with Sabra wrapped around Neil and she falls down? Even the judges were in awe!)

One thing’s for sure, I’ll miss it.

Change.

The one thing that is constant in this life is change and yet it is the one thing that I find most difficult to cope with.

I don’t know why but everytime a change occurs, I get a little anxious. I like being in my “comfort zone”. I like the comfort of habit and the predictability of it all. I like knowing that if I do this and this and this, I will get what I want. I can’t but have expectations based on the things I do. Sometimes, change gets me excited and I actually look forward to it. But then most of the time, it just plain worries me. Most especially if that change has something to do with my personal life. I don’t like not knowing if the change will be positive or negative and I certainly don’t want it to be something that will cause me pain.

But if there’s one thing I learned growing up is that life doesn’t always turn out as planned and it almost never goes that way you expect it to go. Sure we can make plans, dream and hope for the best but we also have to be flexible enough to bend with the unexpected. It’s not always easy to be flexible especially if you’ve already invested so much in your plans. But what can one do, right?

Whatever we do, there will always be factors that are just out of our control and the best we can do is to try and make the most out of the situation and just trust in the knowledge that when God closes a door, he opens a window. And hope, hope with all our might, that we’ll be able to appreciate all of it in the end.

Work woes.

I am completely exhausted. The entire tech team has quit, save for one and several of us in other departments have been absorbing the work overflow. My calendar is fully booked with training sessions and I find myself spending more than half my day catching up on my emails and taking support calls. On top of it all, I have to do QA and implement clients which I am struggling to find time to do.

This is the disadvantage of working for such a small company. Everyone tends to do a bit of everything and when someone leaves, everyone else absorbs the work until a new person is hired to do the job. The sad fact is, we’re not even generating as much revenue as we hope so asking for a raise at this point is pretty pointless.

There are days when I feel like resigning but then there are days when it’s all good. But for praticality’s sake, I should look for a new job.

Rest in pieces.

Steve was playing this song on his PC the other day and I loved it...

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
Cause this hurts deeper than I thought it did
It has not healed with time
It just shot down my spine
You look so beautiful tonight
Reminds me how you laid us down
And gently smiled before you destroyed my life

Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)
Pieces

Look at me, my depth perception must be off again
You got much closer than I thought you did
I'm in your reach
You held me in your hands

Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(let me rest in pieces)

Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
Would you find it in your heart
To make this go away
and let me rest in pieces

would you find it in your heart
to make this go away
And let me rest in pieces
(and let me rest in peices)
would you find it in your heart
and let me rest in pieces

would you find it in your heart
would you let me rest in pieces

would you find it in your heart
would you let me rest in pieces

would you find it in your heart
would you let me rest in pieces

Rest In Pieces
- Saliva

Things that made me smile today.

Steve saved lunch for me and later he made me dinner.

My new Abercrombie & Fitch shirt which fits me perfectly.

A loving brother who always asks me about my day whenever I come home.

Freshly laundered clothes sitting on top of my bed.

It's Friday.

Thinking of wearing my new dress.

Manicured nails.

A good hair day.

Received a really sweet compliment.

Realizing that I have such great friends.

Limits.

For the first time in 2 weeks, I felt cold sitting outside of Second Cup.

I am feeling down again and I don't know if it's because I am tired from work or if it is because I feel overwhelmed with everything that is going on around me. I try not to dwell on things but I am a natural at worrying and this has always caused me unnecessary anxiety. I keep having to tell myself that crap happens and I just have to go with the flow but I always find it difficult to let things slide and just take it as it comes.

I've always been one to stay within my comfort zone and anything that puts me outside of that zone worries me. But there must be some sort of conspiracy because I keep finding myself being pushed to go beyond the lines I have set for myself. Steve actually brought up an interesting thought today. He said that maybe I create too many boundaries for myself by being too careful. God might be telling me something here and I'm missing it somehow.

Annoyed.

I’m already exhausted and it’s barely 11 in the morning.

I’ve heard my name thrown around in the tech department, reception and on the phones. I can’t believe all the different things that popped up all at once. As much as I like my name, I don’t like hearing it so many times in one morning especially when you’re a pesky co-worker asking the same questions every single time when I’ve already given you everything you need in your email and all you have to do is read. And you can’t even do that properly. I know I sound mean… but I can’t help but feel annoyed when I’m already spoon-feeding you and you still need me to hold your hand every time.

I swear sometimes I feel the urge to just run out of the office and never come back.

My life as a telemarketer.

It suddenly occurred to me that I’ve never written about my days as a telemarketer. Being new to Canada in ’04 and adjusting to everything, I had spent my first three months going places like Ottawa and Niagara Falls and exploring downtown Toronto. After three months of frolicking, I decided it was about time I started looking for work. I was a fresh grad – I graduated in March ’04 and arrived in Canada in August.

To be honest, I felt lost not knowing what the industry is like in Canada. Back home, I had a pretty good idea of what I needed and where to begin. I decided to get a career counsellor’s opinion. He had advised that I apply for a job that would give me the necessary skills that would help me get to where I want to go (confusing ba?). And so he said that maybe it would be best if I applied for a job that would give me strong customer service skills since having good customer service skills would open a lot of doors for me. So I decided to apply for a position in a call center. I applied to one where I saw potential to move to either the tech or QA department (me being in I.T.).

I sent my resume, got a call shortly for an interview, went in and was offered the job the same day. It all happened pretty fast if you ask me – one minute I was home and jobless and the next minute I was making my way to work. The rules of that call center were quite simple: you begin on the floor (no, it doesn’t mean janitor… silly! It means man the phones) and then work your way up until you get to a position/department you want to be in. Simple in thought, difficult in reality. It was a telemarketing call center after all.

I hated it. I was ready to resign within the first three months. The only thing that stopped me was the thought of moving up somewhere. Although I dreaded work every single day, I wanted to get something out of the awful experience so I stuck to it for almost a year until I was able to get into QA. Once there, I had decided that I’ve ha enough experience to move on and began looking for another job. Soon after, I was able to land my current job.

Although it was a job I hated very much, I have to admit I learned a lot doing it.

I learned…

>> To always try to be polite with telemarketers on the phone although they are extremely annoying.

>> Remember that the person on the other end of the line is only doing his/her job and probably hates it too.

>> I was once on the other end of the line (although I was much nicer…haha)

>> There is no need to swear or yell or be rude on the phone.

>> I can always have my name taken of the call list if I don’t want them to keep calling (by law, they are required to take your name of a call list if you ask them).

>> Hardwork and patience do pay off.

A Bit of Bio

Nicked from Violet.

MOUTHOLOGY

Q. What is your salad dressing of choice?
A. Greek with Feta, Caesar or Thousand Island.

Q. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
A. Brothers Burgers comes to mind right now

Q. What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
A. Gee, so many to choose from! Because I'm craving, I'd say Tokyo-Tokyo for now.

Q. On average, what size tip do you leave at a restaurant?
A. We normally tip depending on the service we get.

Q. What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick off of?
A. Indian Mangoes

Q. What are your pizza toppings of choice?
A. Mushrooms, Green peppers, onions, pepperoni, mozzarella cheese, ground beef

Q. What do you like to put on your toast?
A. Butter or Cream Cheese (most of the time)

Q. What is your favorite type of gum?
A. Mint - I always carry a pack of Excel Polar Ice with me

TECHNOLOGY

Q. what is your IQ?
A. Currently.... no idea. IQ is based on your age so I wouldn't know what level I'm in right now.

Q. Number of contacts in your email address book?
A. Safe to say it's over a hundred

Q. What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A. A picture of Venice

Q. How many televisions are in your house?
A. Three - one in the living room, one in my bedroom and one in my parents' room but in reality only the TV in the living room is hooked.

BIOLOGY

Q. Are you right-handed or left-handed?
A. Right-handed.

Q. What’s your best feature?
A. No idea...

Q. Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
A. Nope

Q. Which of your five senses do you think is keenest?
A. sheesh.... touch, I think

Q. When was the last time you had a cavity?
A. Have I ever had one? If I did, a long, long time ago

Q. What is the heaviest item you lifted last?
A. Probably Steve's duffel bag that was full of clothes.

Q. Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
A. Nah!

BULL[CRAP]OLOGY

Q. If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
A. No, I don't think so

Q. Is love for real?
A. Yes.

Q. If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
A. I'd retain my name... athough I've always liked the name Nicole... it wouldn't suit me though.

Q. What color do you think looks best on you?
A. Blue or Yellow

Q. Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake?
A. I’m pretty sure I have in the past but I can't remember what it is

Q. Have you ever saved someone’s life?
A. Not that I know of

Q. Has someone ever saved yours?
A. In a way - yes

DAREOLOGY

Q. Would you walk naked for a half mile down a public street for $100,000?
A. If it were completely deserted then maybe I'd consider it

Q. Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100?
A. In the cheek? Yes.

Q. Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000?
A. Heck no

Q. Would you never blog again for $50,000?
A. Maybe....it would be difficult though.

Q. Would you pose naked in a magazine for $250,000?
A. Tough... but no

Q. Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
A. Not worth it.... I'd die if I tried

Q. Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000?
A. No.

Q. Would you give up watching television for a year for $25,000?
A. I think I can do it.

DUMBOLOGY

Q: What is in your left pocket?
A: Nothing

Q: Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a good movie?
A: I haven't even seen it!

Q: Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house?
A: Hardwood

Q: Do you sit or stand in the shower?
A: Stand

Q: Could you live with roommates?
A: Yes

Q: How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
A: at least 5

Q: Where were you born?
A. Philippines

Q: Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
A: Never

Q: What do you want to be when you grow up?
A: Content and happy

LASTOLOGY

Q: Friend you talked to?
A. Steve

Q: Last person who called you?
A: Mom

Q: Person you hugged?
A: Steve

Q: Person you kissed?
A: Steve

FAVORITOLOGY

Q: Number?
A: 7

Q: Colour?
A: Blue, White.... pastel colors

Q: Season?
A: Summer

CURRENTOLOGY

Q: Missing someone?
A: Always

Q: Mood?
A: A bit tired

Q: Listening to?
A: The sound of my keyboard as I type

Q: Watching?
A: My monitor as I type away

Q: Worrying about?
A: work

RANDOMOLOGY

Q: First place you went this morning?
A: the bus stop

Q: What can you not wait to do?
A: Go on vacation

Q: What’s the last movie you saw?
A: The Zodiac on DVD; Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix on cinema

Q: Do you smile often?
A: Yes.

Q: Are you a friendly person?
A: For the most part, yes.

Unpacking and the Sims

I'm back home after a few days of sleeping over at boss' place (FYI, the "boss" happens to be a "she" and I was staying over her place to watch over her cat while she was away for the long weekend). I started unpacking and putting my clothes away as soon as I walked into my bedroom. I took one glance just to check if everything's in place. I always do it even though I know no one really goes into my bedroom unless they need to borrow something (my cordless phone, laptop or some little thing) or put freshly laundered clothes on top of my bed. Since I'd been watching over a cat and most of my clothes were covered in cat hair, I put most of them in the laundry basket and the clothes that I never really wore and remained clean, I put them back in my closet. It always amazes me how much clothes I actually bring with me whenever I go away. It's when I come to realize I really do have plenty to wear.

After putting my stuff away, I grabbed my laptop off my bedroom floor (yeah, don't ask...), grabbed the new games I purchased from Future Shop and proceeded to install them. Steve and I had gone to Future Shop over the weekend and bought a few games (they were so cheap we couldn't resist it). We bought two games each and one of the games I had purchased for myself was "Sims 2 - Glamorous Life". It had been years since I last played the Sims and I thought it would be fun to play it again. So I put the CD in my drive and... it popped up a window saying I needed to have Sims 2 installed first. Dammit! I didn't know I had bought the extension pack!! It was right on the box too! Talk about reading skills... yeesh! I couldn't really be mad could I? My own stupidity, my own fault for buying the darn thing and not realizing I needed to have something else installed first. Double yeesh!

Since playing the game is out of the question, I decided to purchase songs out of iTunes and update my iPod and browse the internet. Duh.

At least I got some of my chores done... something productive.

Unbelievable

I can’t believe my own stupidity sometimes.

Last night I decided to organize my purse and put away my old Metropass. Without realizing it, I ended up putting away the wrong one.

This morning, I stood at the bus stop and waited 10 mins for the bus to arrive. When it finally did, I realized I had the wrong Metropass and couldn’t get on the bus so I had to go back upstairs to our condo, get the right Metropass, go all the way back down and wait for the next bus.

I wasted so much time waiting for the bus only to find out I can’t get on it and then wasted some more time retrieving the right Metropass and then waiting again for the next bus. Yeesh!

15 for 15

Got this from Bom.

RULES:
1. Write something about/for fifteen DIFFERENT people.
2. You can NOT (read: NEVER) say who they are.
3. If someone asks you which one is about/for them, you are NOT to tell.

*************

1. I look up to you in so many ways. You truly are a wonderful person with such a good heart.
2. Although we don’t always agree, I hold your opinion with such high regard.
3. I can’t imagine life without you in it.
4. You’re so stubborn! But I love and adore you just the same.
5. Even when you’re doing the most mundane of things, I fall in love with you.
6. I really hope we don’t drift apart for the stupidest of reasons. I hope I get to keep you in my life for as long as I can. Even if you don’t realize it, you mean a lot to me.
7. It is so easy to talk to you. I trust you.
8. I hope you find someone who will appreciate and treasure you. You deserve someone whose heart is as good as yours.
9. You better be in Manila when I come to visit. I’m so proud of you! I admire you for following your heart despite the many challenges you face.
10. I am at a point where I don’t know if I trust you or not.
11. Sana we can hang out together when I go there for a visit.
12. I think you are such a sweet person.
13. You try my patience a lot and I can’t help but be short with you sometimes.
14. Sometimes I’d rather not hear what you think. Really.
15. As long as you are happy, then I am happy for you. I just worry sometimes that you might be selling yourself short.

A Low

I'm having one of those low days.

Why does it always seem that the things you want the most are the hardest to obtain?

I like to believe that the good things in life are free but there are times when I question that. It feels as if we pay for the good times by having to go through the bad ones. It's as if we have to suffer first to be happy. I don't always feel this way of course, but during those really difficult days, I can't help but think of it.

It's come to a point where everytime I feel extremely happy, I worry. I worry that something bad is bound to happen. Because life isn't perfect and the good comes with the bad. It's a never-ending cycle, you know? High times, low times, high times, low times. It's as if we can only have peace when we die, when all the problems and concerns of the world are far from us. I guess this is part of the reason why the idea of going to heaven is so appealing to us... because finally we are home, where there is no pain and no suffering.

I consider myself to be a generally optimistic person although I think I'm wise enough to know that the reality of a situation isn't as peachy as I hope it would be. Should I be discouraged? Should I just accept the ways of the world, let myself be converned by rules that may not always make sense to me? I don't know. Although it certainly seems easier to just follow... do what the everyone expects of you. Would I be happy about it? Would it be all worth it in the end?

It's difficult to live your life when there are a lot of things that go against you. Not that you're necessarily doing anything wrong... it's just that different people expect different things. Different people want something from you, expect you to be more like them, to see the things they see, believe the things they believe and agree... agree that they are right and you are wrong.

I like to think that I can be strong when needed, that I can always bounce back from whatever is thrown at me. I understand that I can't please everyone and that I am bound to disappoint someone along the way. I also know that I am not perfect, I tend to make wrong decisions too and that at times I tend to be selfish and stubborn.

But I wish that people would see me for who I am - outside of race, religion, culture, sex, age, politics, ancestry... It's already difficult as it is to go through the hardships in life and being pre-judged makes it all the more discouraging. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt, to be considerate and to understand where they are coming from and I wish I would be extended the same courtesy. Apparently, it's too much to ask for.

In Town

I feel more tired today than any other day of this week even though today was the slowest day of the week for me. I think it’s because it’s Friday and I am quite eager to get off work.

Leslie arrived in Toronto shortly after lunch and took a cab to my office. I have to admit that I was a bit worried with her taking a cab driven by an idiot. He was quite rude and didn’t know the addresses I mentioned eventhough they are fairly popular streets. I had to tell him to drive south and then I had to enumerate the streets he would be passing and all that.

Turns out she gave him some attitude during the ride too because he was rude to her. I love my cousin.

I was really glad to see her and gave her a small tour of the office. It - being a small office and all - only took me about 10mins to show her the entire place. I introduced to a bunch of people and afterwards, when we were safely out of earshot, told her who were good and who I hated.

Luckily, I’m still sitting at my old desk in my old office and we had the room to ourselves so we were free to talk. I was a bit swamped with work so I had to keep working on my PC while talking to her at the same time.

After work, Steve was sweet enough to drive us back to the airport to pick up Brian. Then we headed downtown to drop their stuff off at the hotel and then went to a Korean Grill for dinner.

After dinner, Steve and I dropped them off and then headed home ourselves since we were pretty beat from work. When I got home, I proceeded to unpack my stuff and continued reading Harry Potter. I couldn’t resist not finishing the book since I was so close already and was really eager to find out how the story ends. I finally finished around midnight and then went to bed.

Too bad I had to go to work today. I would’ve rather spent the day out with Leslie.

Down below we go

These past few months at work have been excruciating and interesting at the same time. For the most part – painful. I’ve been considering looking for another job. The problem is, that’s all I’m doing… considering.

Most recently, work has been a real rollercoaster ride. Like Steve said, it’s always been a rollercoaster ride but recently it almost feels as if we’re falling right through. Where do we put the blame? There are so many factors that contribute to possible demise of this company.

Several co-workers have submitted their two weeks notice and I think I should do the same. Looking for another job is a lot of work, I admit, but I think at this point it is quite important that I really put effort into it.

It’s time to move on.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

I finally finished reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows!

Wow.

I have to admit I didn’t expect it to end that way. Some of the things that happened, I kinda guessed it already but some of them took me by surprise… wow.

Did I like it?

LOVED IT!

Dinner, The Toronto Zoo, Wonderland and Harry Potter

What a weekend I just had.

Friday night, Steve and I spent the evening with his family. I met his mom (finally!) and although she didn’t speak nor understand English, she was quite polite and friendly. She did give me a hug before I left and told me in Greek that she was glad she met me. Aww.

Then we went to his great aunts’ house and visited for a few minutes and then went to dinner with his dad. We ate at this tiny restaurant called New Orleans and it was quite nice. The place was cozy and warm and the food was absolutely AMAZING! It was a bit pricy of course… each meal was about $20 but it was delicious. I’m not such a big fan of fish but I had tilapia and I loved it. I would definitely go back there.

The following morning, Steve and I went to the Toronto Zoo with my family. We got there around 11am and went through the African Safari first and then the Indo Malay Region and then the Canadian territory and then finally the Dinosaur display. The Toronto zoo is huge! We didn’t expect it to be that big. It was really fun and we enjoyed seeing so many different animals. We saw rhinos, elephants, cheetahs, lions, a polar bear, grizzly bears, giraffes, a cougar, bald eagles, orangutans, gorillas, etc. It was nice to see Steve and my family spend time together. He gets along with them so well especially with JR who has always been the quiet one in the family. After 7 hours of walking, we finally decided to call it a day and head home. Surprisingly, we only covered half of the zoo with those 7 hours! There was so much more to see but we were exhausted already.

That same night, Steve and I pass by Yorkdale to grab a bite and watch a movie. We passed by Indigo because I wanted to get a copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. After eating, we were too tired to do anything else so we decided to just head back home and leave the movie for the following day. We were both so tired that we both did the same thing – went straight to bed and woke up the next morning.

Sunday, I woke up and realized I had slept over 12 hours. Steve had done the exact same thing. We decided to go to Perkins for breakfast and then head out to Wonderland since it was near Perkins anyway. I wasn’t really in the mood for roller coasters… I knew I would get sick as soon as I get on one. Steve was quite thoughtful and considerate, only taking me to rides that were relatively easy and just watched some shows. After Wonderland, we went back home to rest and then went out again to grab dinner and watch Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.

I truly enjoyed the weekend.

Gawk

Steve lives in one of the nicest neighborhoods and quite often, we would pass by such beautiful houses that could make anyone gawk and stare. Some of them are regular sized houses and by that I mean they’re not mansions or anything. But most of them are quite huge and almost guaranteed to have cost over a million dollars.

In the many times we’ve passed these houses, I never see anyone outside nor do I see anyone walk in or come out of any of them. Although once I think I’ve seen a dad playing with his kids outside one of the houses but that was about it. Steve and I always wonder where these people are and whether there are people actually living in these huge houses.

Sometimes while driving through the neighborhood, I wonder what these people do for a living… how do they have the money to pay for such extravagant, expensive houses? They coulnd’t have just inherited money from their ancestors and they couldn’t all be lottery winners…there’s way too many of them! But I do wonder what kind of people they are… are they like the people you meet everyday on the street or like the guy waiting in-line with you in the grocery store? Or are they greedy executives who probably have poor, abused subordinates? What’s it like to have a lot of money or to live in a house so big that you need a map inside?

Seriously, I almost want to go ahead a knock at their door one day and just ask, “what do you do for a living and how do I get that job?”

It Had To Be You

It had to be you, it had to be you;
I wandered around, and finally found - somebody who
Could make me be true, could make me be blue;
And even be glad, just to be sad, thinking of you.

Some others I've seen, might never be mean;
Might never be cross, or try to be boss,
But they wouldn't do.
For nobody else, gave me a thrill - with all your faults, I love you still.
It had to be you, wonderful you;
It had to be you.

Over and Over

There are things that I can read over and over again and still find it funny.

The weekend

I’m hungry. I’ve noticed that around noon, my ability to concentrate on work goes down. It’s as if my tummy is telling me that I’ve been working too much and that it is now time to eat. Of course it doesn’t help that I can smell the food being prepared in the kitchen (our company provides us lunch).

While waiting for lunch, I guess I might as well talk about my weekend. On Friday, Steve was off work and the day was going by oh-so-slow-I-almost-died. I was so glad to see him after work when he came by to pick me up. We spent our Friday evening just relaxing at home with Fey and watching “Harold and Kumar go to White Castle”. I’ve never seen it before and I thought it was pretty funny. We had originally intended to go and see Tansformers that night but the showtimes were too late for us to go see it.

Steve picked me up early Saturday morning because we were going to go to the JW Convention in Hamilton. I’ve never been to Hamilton before and it felt like a long drive although it took us only an hour to get there. I was amazed to see so many people… I honestly didn’t know there were so many JWs… It was pretty interesting and I have to admit I learned somethings I didn’t know or think of before. After lunch, I was trying my best not to fall asleep but it was just impossible so I ended up dozing off. Steve was laughing at me at one point because I was bobbing for apples. The blue dress I wore that day (which happened to be new) had purple ink on it and a bit of strawberry juice by the end of the day. Talk about being clumsy.

That same evening, we had planned to see Transformers but once again, the showtimes weren’t that great and so we ended up watching a Korean movie with Fey and Daniel. It was such a good movie and had us fighting back tears through it. I ended up crying at the end of it. It was just so sad. It was a very impressive movie. We just don’t know what the title of the movie is because it’s in Korean.

Sunday, the family and I went to a Chinese Restaurant downtown and had lunch there to celebrate mum’s b-day. It was fun but the weather was awful. It had rained the entire day and everything was just damp and humid. After lunch, we decided to do a bit of shopping at the Eaton Centre and then I went to meet up with Steve. Later that night we took Daniel with us to an Italian Restaurant and then just relaxed at home after.

So the weekend has come and gone and we still haven’t been able to see Transformers.

Slow Day

Wah. Today was one of the slowest days at work. EVER.

The day just seemed to drag on and on and on and I’ve been trying to keep myself entertained with anything I can find to do. Unfortunately, it didn’t help at all but I’ve managed to survive.

And now, it’s officially the weekend! YAY!

Bad Mood

I’m so tired, it’s not funny. Plus the fact that Steve’s off today makes being at work even worse. Ugh. Not having my partner-in-crime at work is NOT GOOD.

JR and Miguel saw Transformers yesterday and they said it was really good. I’m dying to see it too but thinking of long lines and crowded cinemas makes the whole thing seem like such an ordeal. I’ve heard nothing but good reviews about it and I’m sure I will love it. I mean, how can you not want to see it?!

Because Stevie isn’t at work, we’ve had to order pizza for lunch. We normally have pizza on Fridays anyways but today’s pizza was just too soggy and not appetizing at all. I knew it, today would absolutely suck.

As you can tell, I’m not in the best of moods and I wonder if it’s because (A) Steve’s off today (B) I’m super duper sleepy OR (C) I’m PMS-ing.

I just want the work day to be over already. Can you give me that?

Doodles on Paper

I was a little bored at work today so I started doodling on pieces of paper with my new set of multi-colored pens. Everytime I needed a break from testing, I would whip out my pens and start writing nonsense on a piece of paper. I would make fancy letters and color the middle. I’m most likely wasting paper and ink but it’s entertaining.

I had written a single word on a small piece of paper with a red pen and colored the insides of the letters with purple. After much work, I looked at what I had made and admired it for its abundance in color. And then I proceeded to tell myself how creative I was and how much time is going by just by doodling (oh sorry, I was making “art”).

Then after admiring my work, I looked at my watch and realized I only wasted 5 minutes of my time. Great, that’s just craptastic.

300

This serves as my 300th post! YAY!

Cheers to me and all my posting efforts!

YAY!

Two Left Feet

Sometimes I will be listening to a really upbeat song on my iPod or in the car with Steve and I’ll start moving to the song, forgetting that I’m not alone and other people are probably looking at me thinking I’m crazy.

I would often realize what I am doing after a few minutes, start looking around to see if anyone is looking and blush a bit in embarassment. Just the other day, while waiting for the pedestrian light to turn green, I started moving to a song I was listening to. By the time I realized I probably looked like a fool, this guy in a car was looking at me with an expression I can’t quite read. I was so embarassed that I crossed the road in a hurry and rushed inside our condo.

Last night, Steve was driving me home and the radio started playing The Way I Are and I started moving to it and Steve looked at me and laughed. It was a bit embarassing but what could I do? I had to laugh.

I love to dance but I don’t think I’m very good at it. In fact, I do most of my dancing in my bedroom where no one else can see. Even when I go out with others to a club or a party, I hesitate to dance. I always get very self-conscious and I try to hide behind the really good dancers. I know, I should just let go and try to have fun with it.

Cold

I’m so glad to not be training today. I feel very tired and coffee this morning didn’t help. To keep myself occupied, I’ve decided to do a bit more QA and my bug list has tripled in size. Yeah, the boss won’t be happy with development and development won’t be happy with me.

I was smart enough to wear warmer clothing today. I’ve been refusing to wear warm clothing for some time now because I feel that I SHOULD be wearing light summer clothes since it is SUPPOSED to be hot outside. But the past few days have been a little cold and so I thought it’s about time that I wear clothes that would cover me up a bit more so walking outside or riding the train wouldn’t be so uncomfortable.

Sometimes I wonder where all the cold air is coming from. Darn Alaska.

One Hip Slip Too Many

Last night I passed by the mall on my way home because I needed to buy a bottle of conditioner, body lotion, and a black hip slip. I bought a black dress over the weekend and if I stood in the sun, you can almost see through it and glimpse my undies. Of course I wasn’t having any of that so I needed to buy a hip slip.

Now, who knew that finding a hip slip would be such a difficult task? I thought they would have it at La Senza for sure but apparently they don’t make hip slips. Dammit, I don’t need them to make one… I just need them to sell one! So there I was walking through Eaton Centre, entering stores that I thought might possibly sell them and found nothing. Finally, I decided I would check Sears since it was the nearest one to me. It was horrible. First, I couldn’t find an attendant who could tell me if they sold them so I spent a good amount of time walking around trying to find someone. When I finally did find someone, they pointed me to the farthest corner of the floor and said they would be on a rack against the wall. I got there and all of them were not only long but they were too big.

So I decided to check out The Bay. The Bay happens to be on the other side of the mall so I had to walk all the way across and then go several floors up until I got to the appropriate section. Similar to Sears, they also had them in a corner but luckily enough, they had my size. Just to be sure I tried them on and then paid for it. I ended up getting home late just because of a stupid hip slip.

I really did consider just returning the dress at one point.

End of Season

The end-of-season sale has already begun and I can’t help but feel sad. It’s a huge indicator that summer is almost over and I feel as though it hasn’t even begun yet. The weather has been a bit crappy and the temperature’s not even close to what it should be by this time of the year. Winter seems to drag on and on and on and summer always seems to fly by. It’s just not fair.

I’ve only been able to wear my bathing suit once and I want to go to the beach and go swimming still. Summer just CANNOT be over yet! I refuse!

Random Fact

One random thing I learned at the ROM on Sunday: The weekend was born sometime during the 1870’s. During that time, people worked 6 days of the week and only had Sunday’s off. The men worked for 10-12 hours per day while women worked 12-14 hours. Several companies noticed that the number of people showing up late for work on Mondays was increasing and so they started to let employees out early on Saturdays and hence the weekend was born.

Interesting huh?

Canada Day Weekend

The long weekend has come and gone and I am once again sitting at my desk at work wishing it was the long weekend all over again. It was a good break – having started the long weekend right with a BBQ in the office. It was nice to be at work on a Friday afternoon, doing nothing but eating BBQ and talking with people instead of working.

Friday night, Steve and I met up with friends at Jack Astor’s to celebrate Elisabeth’s graduation. We thought we’d be late but traffic had cooperated and we got there right on time. The following morning, Saturday, Steve and I had breakfast at Crème de la Crème along Bloor Street West and then headed downtown to the Royal Ontario Museum. He had gotten us museum tickets since I’ve never been there. We didn’t want to have to worry about parking downtown so we decided to take transit instead. Steve was so adorable taking the TTC… he was swiping the metropass the wrong way. LOL.

The ROM had 4 floors, all of which we visited. It was pretty amazing and we both loved it. It’s so interesting to see and learn about so many different things. We had taken some pictures with my phone camera since I had forgotten my digital camera at home. By the end of it, our feet hurt and we were starving. We must’ve been there for atleast 3 hours but it was all worth it. After the ROM, we took a walk along Yorkville and did a bit of shopping. That same night, we met up with Denny and company and went to Remy’s and had drinks on the rooftop. Since I don’t like the taste of alcohol, I drank iced tea the entire time. It was fun but I was freezing. It would’ve been nice to stay there for several hours if it weren’t so cold.

Sunday, I attended my first ever JW meeting with Steve. We stopped by Milestones first to have lunch since we had an hour to kill. YUM! The meeting we attended only lasted an hour and afterwards we headed to his place to change and then went to the beaches to play beach volleyball with his friends. I haven’t played volleyball since highschool and it is pretty safe to say I sucked at it. Steve on the other hand was amazing. He was the best player among all of us and I’m not being biased or anything. It’s the truth! He can return the ball and serve with ease. While he was racking up points for the team, I was getting bruised on my arms from the hitting the ball so hard. I don’t even know who lost of who won or how many games in total everyone played.

After volleyball, we went to another beach for the bonfire and to watch the fireworks display. It was so cold and thankfully we had brought a blanket with us. We were surprised at how many people had shown up. We had a beautiful view of the city and the water but it was super uncomfortable sitting on the rocks. Steve and I kept complaining how much our bum, our back and our legs hurt and we kept adjusting our sitting position and trying to find ways to make ourselves comfortable. After a couple of hours, we decided to head home since it was just plain uncomfortable already and we were freezing. We both got home at 3:00 am and I was so tired that I couldn’t even say my prayers straight.

Monday, Steve and I decided to go to his cousin’s place and we had brunch together and played Monopoly. I had to take a nap after because I was still exhausted from the day before. We spent the entire day there and left late to go home.

It really was a great weekend. We got to do so many things and see people and although we were pretty tired after, we had so much fun. Dammit, can we move back time and do it all over again?

iPod Update

We’re having a company BBQ today at work which means we’re only working half the day! YAY!

I slept at 2am this morning since I was ripping CDs, downloading music and transferring them over to my iPod. I had originally intended to go to bed early but I kept telling myself, “Just one more CD… just one more song…” and on and on and on it went until it was already too late. I’m the type of person that likes to finish what they start so it’s difficult for me to put something down once I start it. I keep telling myself I can always do it another time but for some reason I feel the need to get everything done right then and there. It works to my advantage most of the time so I am guessing this is a good trait.

And then there’s the odd circumstance where it is a disadvantage. But if the positives are more than the negatives, then I’m definitely keeping the habit.

So now, I have over 800 songs on my iPod and three music videos. Purchasing videos on iTunes is quite expensive… at least I think so.

I bought my new iPod a cute case that when I carry it with me, it looks like I’m carrying a wallet. I guess it’s a little weird because now it looks like I am listening to my wallet. But it’s still cute so I’m keeping it.

One more thing: JR bought a set of iPod earphones that came with an FM tuner but it doesn’t work with his iPod so he gave them to me in exchange for my regular earphones. Sweet.

Shop Crazy

I’m so tired. I only got 4 hours pf sleep last night and I swear the train ride this morning seemed shorter than usual and didn’t really allow me to nap. I’m glad I only have to stay at work until 3pm today since I have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon.

I was hoping to get a few things done tonight and maybe take a stroll downtown if I have enough energy. It’s quite nice and sunny outside and it’s ideal for a walk along Queen Street West. I would love to take a walk along Bloor Street West and look at the little shops there but I don’t have time to do that today.

I am dying to go shopping but I am also trying to save so it’s really an internal battle. Last night Steve and I went shopping with Fey and it was quite the shopping marathon. It’s funny that out of the three of us, I was the one who ended up not getting anything when I’m the avid shopper. I was quite proud of the fact I didn’t spend but I must admit that it’s also partly because I didn’t find anything I liked in particular. I tried a few things on but none of them looked good on me or worth spending money on. It was an accomplishment nonetheless.

I need some skirts, dresses, shorts and another pair of jeans.

iPod

I lost my iPod the other day. I think I may have put it down in the dressing room in one of the stores I went to but I can’t be sure. I only went to three different places and I must’ve put it down somewhere and just forgot about it. By the time I realized I didn’t have it with me, an hour had gone by and when I retraced my steps, it led me nowhere. I knew I wouldn’t find it anyways because it’s very unlikely that someone would find an iPod and return it. But still, I was hopeful.

So there you go, my iPod is gone and although I’ve had it for over a year, it was still worth a bit of money when I bought it and now all that money I spent has gone down the toilet. Although I am sure I have a copy of most of the songs I’ve collected, I am still sad about the fact that there are some songs I had ripped off someone else’s CDs and now I don’t have them anymore. I would have to either re-download or purchase it off iTunes.

Anyhoo, I was already pondering on the amunt of money I would need to save so I can buy a new iPod. But last night, Steve gave me a video iPod! YAY! It was so sweet of him. I was really touched. I had started putting songs in it but as of today I only have 200 plus songs and I will have to look for other songs.

I may have lost my iPod but I have a very thoughtful Steve.

What's in a Name?

I came across this article on yahoo and I can’t help but feel sorry for the kid. Can you imagine what it would be like to fill out a form? Imagine applying for a credit card!

You know those boxes they have on forms where you need to enter each letter of your name in a box? Ah…yeah… go figure how she’ll manage.

Or imagine what it must be like during the first day of school when the teacher calls out each student’s name? Five whole minutes would’ve gone by and she’d still be reciting the kid’s name.

How about legal documents like a birth certificate or a passport? Sheesh!

Poor kid, good luck memorizing your name!

Babbling

Today looks like another day full of QA. Not that I’m complaining... I’d pick QA over training ANY TIME.

This being said, I don’t think I will be pursuing training as a career. It just isn’t something I enjoy doing. People have told me to pursue it because I do it well and there’s good money in it. But if every time I have training I feel depressed, doesn’t that tell you I hate it? I mean, what’s the point in doing something you don’t want to do even if it pays well, right?

Anyhow, we celebrated JR’s b-day on Sunday and we were both talking about how old we were getting and how fast time flies and how it certainly seemed only yesterday we were still kids. He said something like, “I imagined me at this age differently…” I laughed because I imagined me at my age differently too. I think everyone does. We all have an image of ourselves several years from now and sometimes we tend to over do it to a point that we get awfully disappointed when we reach that age and we are far from what we had envisioned ourselves to be. Don’t get me wrong, I think it is healthy to have a goal… to want to be something by a certain point in your life. I think it motivates us to make something of ourselves and not just let our lives fly by. But at the same time, I think we should also consider the fact that life is unpredictable and doesn’t always go as planned but it doesn’t mean we’re any less than what we originally thought we were going to be. Yes, it is different but not necessarily bad. Certain hiccups in life actually help us become better people in a lot of ways which may not necessarily be so obvious. There are lessons we’ve learned and lessons we have yet to learn and although our lives are not as grand as we envisioned it would be, it makes us see life in a different perspective.

I’m babbling aren’t I?

Rides

I was looking at the list of top ten rollercoasters on MSN this morning and looking at some of them brought back the nausea I felt during our last trip to Wonderland. Steve and I rode the Vortex and it would have been fun if I didn’t bang my head a million times agains the seat. The head banging was what made me dizzy at the end of the ride.

I love going to amusement parks and going on rides although I avoid rides that spin too much because I tend to get sick. I’ve always loved amusement parks since I was little and I remember my parents taking us to Big Bang in Alabang in December. Although it seems to me that rides don’t really make you dizzy when you’re little and for some reason, as you grow older, you get more nauseus going on them.

I’ve always wondered… why doesn’t Wonderland have a Ferris Wheel?

Time

Listening to “You Get What You Give” by the New Radicals… brings back so many fond memories.

The other night, mum showed me pictures of my nephews in the Phils and I was so shocked to see how big they had grown. I could almost swear they were babies and toddlers when we left and now they’re huge! All of a sudden I could feel the amount of time that has passed since I left the country and I felt a sudden longing to come home. As if coming home would turn back time.

I am forever amazed by the passing of time. We don't notice it so much until we stop to look at what has changed since then.

Nap Time

I finally figured out why I’m so sleepy today. It because I drank orange juice instead of coffee this morning! This is, of course, my presumption. I could be wrong.

I struggled to keep my eyes open the entire morning and it reminded me of those funny cartoons where they put toothpicks to hold their eyelids up. For a second there, it almost seemed like a solution. I tried drinking plenty of water (I don’t know why I thought that would help), chewed gum, listened to lively music, talked to people, walked around the office and tried to post… but all to no avail. I couldn’t concentrate on anything I was trying to do because because I was too busy trying to stay awake. I miserably stared at my PC and complained to Steve… like complaining would help keep me up.

To make things worse, I had to train a client today and I was not in the mood for it. At all. It’s so difficult to train someone when all you feel like doing is falling asleep right then and there. I managed to survive but it was a bit painful. Thankfully, it wasn’t a full day of training or else I would’ve cried.

Wah. I really need a nap… to fall into sweet slumber right now would be amazing.

Lesser Evil

Darn it, you know that exfoliating cream I had successfully avoided buying? It freakin’ works! It actually works!

You know what that means?

That means I should have bought it! Dammit! Arrrgghh.

Anyhow, work has stepped up and it’s been a little busy for me. I’ve been handling work-related stress a bit better and just trying to take things in stride. My so-called work-related stress isn’t so much about the job… the cause is the people I work with (not all of them) and the lack of direction. I just found out that I am moving once again to another desk (this would be my 2nd move from my original desk) and I have to say I am not too happy about it. I had to choose the lesser evil. It was either sitting beside a co-worker I don’t like or sitting at a desk which exposes everything I am doing on my computer. Tough… do I choose the annoying co-worker who would eventually annoy me to death? Or do I choose to move to a desk facing the hallway?

For my own sanity, I chose the hallway.

Think, people

I came across this article on MSN and it surprises me that people don’t think about this kind of thing happening. Every time I see pictures of lottery winners on the front cover of a newspaper or on TV, I can’t help but shake my head in disapproval and go, “What the heck were these people thinking?!”

Don’t you realize that telling the world you have $20 million dollars makes you a really good target for people with bad intentions?

In the Philippines (if I remember correctly), they don’t publish winners’ identities simply because of how dangerous it is. We are well aware of just how many bad and desperate people are out there. We can’t even display our cellphones in public too much for fear of attracting a stalker/hold-upper/thief. I remember going to Glorietta one summer with my family to buy school supplies. We had lunch and then my mom realized her purse had been stolen… together with at least 5000php in it and all her credit cards and bank cards. It was so bad. I also remember commuting to UST one early morning with 5 people in the jeep and the guy near the exit was holding a knife and asking the girl beside me to give him her watch. Her watch! It wasn’t even anything special… it was plain and old.

So when you are out there smiling towards a camera, waiving a check in hand and a headline that says, “Winner of $20 million…” Is it not just plain D-U-M-B? Is it really all that surprising when someone tries something against you?

Be more wary people.

Darn makeup

Phone banking can be such a pain sometimes. It allows you to make transactions like paying bills and moving money around but when you want to find out what happened to your money or if you want the last 10 transactions since your last statement, it gives you such a hard time. It's a freakin' conspiracy I tell you. It doesn't want you to monitor your money at all!

I decided to pass by The Bay on my way home because I needed to buy makeup. I forgot that Tuesdays isn't such a good time to pass by because that's when they have makeup artists that give free makeovers and stuff. It's really good if you're looking at buying a lot of makeup or if you want to try different things. But when your goal is to come and just buy the one thing you need, it's really not an ideal situation because you get tempted to buy so many things you do NOT need. It turns out to be really expensive and before you know it, you're walking out of the store broke.

I have a spending problem. I really do.

Tanned

I love the summer. It’s warm, I can wear anything I want, go places and do stuff outdoors… it’s just plain awesome.

I spent most of my weekend under the sun and I got pretty tanned. Miss-smarty-pants here didn’t put any sunblock on so not only am I bright red on my cheeks, shoulders and neck, but I am also in pain. My legs are a bit sore from swimming and because I am burnt, it stings when my clothes rub against my skin. I used to be the most fair in my family and now I’m the darkest. JR keeps teasing me about it and dad keeps rubbing it in some more.

Mum: “Don’t worry, it will go away in the winter and you’re skin will return to its natural color.”

Me: “But summer is just beginning which means I’m going to get burnt some more! Ang itim ko na!”

Mum: “Bakit, you’re Filipino naman ah… You are supposed to be a bit dark”

Me: “Eh kaso I’m not dark naman by nature noh! I was born fair so getting tanned doesn’t mean I’m returning to my natural color. Not even close”

Mum: “Sabi na kasi you should’ve worn sunblock. Ang kulit kasi eh.”

I felt better later when Steve and I went out for dinner and he said he likes my new color. He said I have a “glow”. I smiled…

Great Weekend.

• Pay Day
• Breakfast at Perkins
• Paramount Wonderland
• Swimming
• A nice tan (or so everyone says… it stings though)
• A squeeky clean bath tub (without me cleaning it)
• Finding a super nice, dark pair of jeans that fit me perfectly
• Being able to buy a cute top 5 mins before the store closed
• Lining up to buy an expensive piece of clothing and then just when I’m about to pay, being told it was on sale for half the price!
• Getting Love Generation for a ringtune (and it sounds awesome)
• Spending time with the family and going to Little Italy for lunch
  
  And of course, lots and lots of time with Stevie!!

One Word: WOW

Saw this today and it honestly brought tears to my eyes...(Watch the judges reactions). In Simon Cowell's own words, "Absolutely Fantastic".



While the first one ALMOST brought me to tears, this next one ACTUALLY DID! She's so adorable!



This are some more that I thought were really good...









Last one to make you laugh!

So You Think You Can Dance?

Here are a few video clips from the show where the dancing and the choreography just blew me away!

Enjoy!

Sara and Jesus (Cabaret Hoover by The Triplets of Belleville)


Kameron and Lacey (Dancing by Elisa)


Cedric and Faina (Get it Shawty by Lloyd)


Hok and Jamie (Tambourine by Eve)

Lola

I got into the elevator last night to make my way up to our floor in the building and the scent that greeted me upon entering reminded me of my grandmother’s house in QC. It smelled exactly the same and it’s almost as if my grandmother was in the elevator with me. I got a little freaked out coz you know what they say about that right?

Anyhoo, I felt a little sad because I haven’t seen her since we left for Canada almost 3 years ago and I truly miss her and her b-day parties. She’s such a sweet old lady with a great capacity for listening. We used to see her almost every other weekend and when she knew we were coming to visit, she would prepare dishes that she knew we loved. She would prepare a dish for my dad (he’s the most picky out of all of us I think) and she would also prepare dishes for my 2 brothers (that would most likely consist of chicken). Mum and I would eat whatever was there. If we came late and she’s already eaten, she would still sit with us in the dining table and just watch us eat and listen to our stories. Looking at her, it was obvious she enjoyed our visits and loved it when we shared our stories with her regardless of how mundane our topics were. After lunch if we felt sleepy she would tell us to go lie down in her bedroom and she would turn on the aircondition so we were comfortable. Mind you she doesn’t use it herself because she says it’s a waste of electricity and it that it was pretty expensive to use and yet she would gladly let it run the entire afternoon when we were there.

Wanna know a secret? She can finish a whole half-gallon of her favorite ice cream all by herself! I’ve never seen her do it in one sitting but apparently others have. I look at her and I can’t help but think, “Where does all that ice cream go?”

The one thing about grandmothers is that they know how to cook, clean and sew. When we were younger, I remember her making pillow cases and pajamas for us. She could sew curtains and dresses and make all sorts of stuff. Sadly, it’s a skill that has not been passed over to me. Consider it lucky if I hem a pair of pants right. Sewing for me consists of taking my clothes to someone who knows how.

I remember JR and me going to Bacolod with her during the summer. She would bring a pack of gum or candy with her to ease our discomfort with air pressure. To ensure we had a safe flight, she would ask us to pray with her while the plane was taking off. She never let us out of her sight even for bit. She would patiently sit in the garden while we play with our cousins and she would peel Santol and give it to us.

Dad told me one time that he gets in trouble every time my brothers and I get sick. My grandmother would call and reprimand my dad for not taking better care of us and that he should do this and that. He would assure her of course that he was doing the best he could but she would call every few hours to check how we were doing.

I don’t know if she knows I remember all of it. She probably thinks we were too young to remember… but I remember. In fact, I remember all of the little things she does for us that never fail to tell me how much she loves us even if she doesn’t say it.

I hope you know that I love you lola.

Perhaps It Was Her?

A Chinese co-worker asked me the other day whether I have a great grandfather somewhere in my family who is pure Chinese. I said I wasn’t sure but I was told I have a Chinese surname and a pure Chinese relative on both sides of the family. He said I should find out because according to Chinese tradition, having a pure Chinese grandfather (or a male Chinese ancestor – great grandpa or great, great grandpa, etc.) would make me Chinese even though we got mixed along the way. I found this very interesting so I decided I would Google it and see what information I could find.

The very first link that came up led me to a forum with single post from a person with the exact same name as one of my great aunts who had passed away a few years ago. Unfortunately there’s no further information available aside from her name so I can’t tell for sure if it is in fact her or if it’s just a coincidence that someone else happens to have the exact same name.

It made me miss her all of a sudden.

Still the same?

I was browsing my Friendster account this morning and happened to check out my best friend from childhood’s profile. Every time I look at pictures of him, I am often amazed at how much he’s grown and matured over the years. I can still remember him as a boy…very playful and a bit talkative. I remember all the bike rides, afternoons spent outside playing games, going to the playground and all those nights in December when we would go caroling.

I haven’t spoken to him in years… I can’t even remember the last time I spoke to him nor the reasons for why we drifted apart considering we lived right next to each other. I guess living next door to someone doesn’t mean you can’t stop talking. I can only presume it must be due to our age gap…I’m two years younger and maybe somewhere along the way he grew up way faster than I did.

Sometimes I wonder how much he’s changed in the years since I last spoke to him… did he change at all? What type of music does he like now? When I think about these things, I am surprised at how much I still don’t know about him. Sure, we were best friends but that was a long time ago when our conversations were composed merely of what games we were going to play, who among the kids in our neighborhood were cool and some TV programs.

Looking at his Friendster page, I can’t help but smile when I see a movie or TV show he has listed as a favorite and it’s a favorite of mine too. Maybe we’ve both grown up and maybe we’ve both changed in so many different ways but maybe, just maybe, we’re still alike in some things.

It's the job

1 more hour then it’s 5pm! Yey! Freedom!

I am testing a third system now and it’s the best one by far in a sense that it’s got way cooler features than the other two. I am eager to get this one up and running smoothly because I think it will be an awesome update to the existing system. Not only would it remedy a lot of the existing issues, it would also make it a lot more efficient and less time consuming to use.

Okay, I know I’m speaking programmer again. So I’m gonna stop myself before I start getting real technical and bore you to death.

My work calendar for next week is filling up faster than I can say “shoot me”. It’s not all that bad… it will keep me occupied and will make the days go by faster but at the same time, it’s guaranteed to be exhausting.

Another thing to look forward to is the fact that Mr. Pres will be flying out and will most likely be gone for several weeks. The sad thing is, he’ll be replaced with people who I don’t like either. There’s just no winning this situation. Hmpf.

I really have to look into playing the Lottery soon…

Friends

I feel fortunate to have such great friends who despite being so far away still think of me and still say hi once in awhile. I feel loved and cared for and for someone like me who is miles away and lives in a totally different timezone, it truly means a lot. Even the little things are truly appreciated. I love the fact that I know I can always talk to them when I need them and they are always there to listen and offer comfort.

I love my friends and I hope that others are as fortunate as I am.

Tester needs a break

I’ve been doing QA all day and it’s making me awfully sleepy. I’ve done 2 systems so far and I need a break. As much as I love testing, it’s also very tiring after awhile. I need to keep myself as alert as possible so I don’t miss anything and so that I document each and every tiny detail. I am contemplating going outside in the sun for a bit to get some fresh air but since Mr. Pres is in the office today, I am having second thoughts.

How I wish I could nap right now.

Independence Day!

Happy Philippine Independence Day!

I remember when we celebrated our 100th year of independence. My family and I went to Roxas Blvd to watch the festivities. It was such a big event and there were so many people. I remember how expensive a bottle of water cost and at the end of the day, all the drinks were sold out and you couldn’t buy water nor pop anywhere.

They had the parade which was both interesting and beautiful. It was the most lavish parade I’ve seen in the Philippines. I haven’t really seen any other major parade except for the usual Santacruzan although I wanted to see the Mask parade in Bacolod City which takes place during lent. Come to think of it, I don’t think Santacruzan is considered a parade… it’s more of a procession really.We had taken some pictures but I can’t remember where we kept them.

I also remember the fireworks that night. We were staning along the coast and they were lighting fireworks off a barge. It was the longest fireworks display I’ve seen and it apparently cost the government billions of dollars. If only I had a video camera back then…

I remember we were so hungry after the whole event and we had such a hard time looking for a place to eat. Every place we went to, the lines were so long that they stretched all the way out the door. We were starving so my parents decided to just eat anywhere where we can find food. After much walking, we found a Joe Kwan and decided to eat there. Of course the food wasn’t that great but when you’re hungry you become less picky. It actually tends to taste better than it really is. LOL. The funny thing is, after we ate, we noticed a bunch of restaurants lined down the road. If we had walked a bit further, we would’ve been able to choose between Pizza Hut, Wendy’s, etc.

It was about 1am when we finally finished eating and our next dilemma was how we were going to get home. We didn’t bring a car with us at the time because we knew parking would’ve been impossible. At 1am, the LRT is closed and there are barely any buses. We had to take a bus to Makati City and then take another bus to Alabang and then take a jeep to Las Piñas from there. We literally went all over the place just to get home. It was past 2am by the time we arrived home and I remember being so tired that we literally fell on our beds.

Eventhough it was very exhausting, we had so much fun and we really enjoyed the celebration. I was glad we went because I felt it was worth it. Plus, how often does one’s county celebrate a hundred years of independence right?

Bits and Pieces

I was updating my Multiply site this morning and I realized it doesn’t actually transfer all of my posts in Blogger. I have no idea why.

Anyhow, I rented some DVDs last night and one of them was Russel Peters’. I’m telling you, that guy is so funny. If you haven’t seen him, go to YouTube and search for his videos. I especially love it when he imitates accents. He’s so good at it.

Another DVD I rented is The Celestine Prophecy. I’ve seen the book several times before at Indigo and Chapters and have always wanted to read it. I never really read the book but I was curious when I saw the DVD. The movie wasn’t too impressive but maybe the book’s better. I know I like the Harry Potter books better than the movies.

I’m so sleepy. I got 7 hours of sleep last night but I really feel like I need more. Doesn’t your bed feel so much softer when you’re tired? I had such a difficult time getting out of bed this morning. After taking a bath and getting ready for work, I leaned my head against a pillow and closed my eyes for 5 minutes. I wish I could just stay in bed until noon.

I was reading the Metro on the subway and there was a brief article about a one-year old baby who fell from an apartment window on the 14th floor. A bunch of clotheslines had broken the baby’s fall and the baby actually landed on the grass unharmed and just crawled after landing. How amazing is that?! It truly shows that God is watching and nothing happens without God’s permission. Don’t ask me how a one-year old baby could fall out of a window because I have no idea.

Names

You know that silly thing most women do? Ya know, when we think of names we’ll give our kids someday…?

I’ve done it and I’m pretty sure you’ve done it at some point too.

It’s funny because I’ll hear or read a name that I will like and then at some later point I will meet a girl or a guy that has that name and he/she turns out to be a real….a real… am I allowed to say a**? Okay, let’s just say that person turns out to be someone I really don’t like. You know what happens? It ruins that name forever for me. For instance, I think I will never name my boy Michael because I know so many Michaels who are pretty notorious and arrogant (no offense to the Michaels out there who are genuinely nice).

Sometimes I’ll meet someone and I’ll say to myself, “that person has such a cute name…” and then I get to know them a little better and get disappointed. And then I end up saying, “too bad, that name’s out the door!”.

I am afraid my kid will turn out the same way (although it is more of a superstition rather than a fact). Bottomline is, I don’t want to give my kid a name that reminds me of a person I dislike.

Cherry, cherry black

The other night while having dinner with the family:

Me: Ma, these cherries are so good!

Mum: Hay naku! Do you know how long it took me to pick the good ones?!

Me: Mmm… yummy! The darker ones, the ones that are almost black in color are so much sweeter than the red ones…

Dad: That’s how you tell the ripe ones… di mashado masarap yung red…

Me: Mmmm... talaga ha... we also had them at work the other day.. Steve got them... I finished the entire pack all by myself...hehe


So there we were, sitting and eating a bowl of cherries… after awhile:


Me: Ma, your teeth are turning black… and so are your lips! Katuwa!

Mum: Onga eh… nevermind, it will go away when I brush my teeth after…


after a brief pause...


Me: Shites! You mean my teeth and gums were black when I was eating them at work?! I kept smiling at people pa naman whenever they passed me… shiyet…

Workaholics

On MSN:

Paolo says: hey

Karen says: hey

Paolo says: Are u also waiting for Friday?

Karen says: definitely

Karen says: Fridays are the only reason I go to work on Mondays really

Karen says: LOL

Paolo says: I know.


Where art thou Friday?

Another Late Night

Last night I had decided that I was going to go to bed earlier than usual. I’ve been having a lot of late nights and it’s getting to a point where I can almost hear my body begging for more rest. I did a bit of shopping (hey, it was on sale okay! Don’t be too hard on me…) and was home a little after 7pm. I had dinner and then watched “Signs” on TV with JR. I was right on schedule (I planned to be in bed by 10pm) but as I was about to go to bed, I decided to go on YouTube just to see if there are any videos of Russel Peters (for those of you who are not familiar with him, he’s a comedian who does stand-up comedy). That was a mistake.

I got hooked. DAMN YOU RUSSEL!! I ended up going to bed at midnight instead of 10pm. Yargh!

The Early Bird

I am proud to say I started working even before 9am today. Aren’t I the eager one?

I arrived at the office around 8:40am like I normally do. I grabbed a cup of coffee and half a bagel with cream cheese and told Steve to go on MSN. Usually, both Steve and I grab our coffees and our bagels and sit down and eat together until 9am and then we begin our work day. But since Mr. Pres is in town and was in the office so freakin’ early today, we couldn’t afford to have our morning chat and were forced to go back to our individual desks and eat by ourselves. I checked my e-mails, forgot about my food for a bit and started replying. Since I’m already at my desk, I figured I might as well get started early.

It actually feels good knowing I’ve accomplished more than half the tasks I have for the day. I am hoping (cross my fingers) that I will have an easy afternoon. After all, I did bust my ass in the morning.

What?!

A career in IT is not one of the 12 Indestructible careers??

What am I going to do now??

12 Indestructible Careers on MSN

Not Fair

It’s so beautiful outside that it’s such a shame we have to be at work today. It’s such a crime to have beautiful weekdays and rainy weekends. It just isn’t fair.

If I could, today I would:

Get a bit more sleep
Go to a breakfast place and order bacon and eggs with toast and a glass of OJ.
Go to the beach, or park or Wonderland or all three

I would have been able to do something fun outdoors! Instead, I am sitting in front of my PC at work, doing QA and answering e-mails in between.

At least I get to write posts.

Interesting...

I need to get myself one of these jobs:

Eight Super-sized Salaries

Wow. They make the job sound so easy don't they?

Slower than a Turtle

Today couldn’t have gone by any slower. It was another one of those really slow work days and although I had stuff to do, I also had a lot of free time on my hands. I decided to take advantage of said free time to re-do my layout, create some posts and label all of my posts. I had long been thinking of labeling them but have been procrastinating since I already had so many posts and labeling all of them would be time consuming. It wasn’t as hard as I had expected it to be since there’s a function that allows me to select multiple entries and label them at the same time. It was actually very user friendly and so easy to use.

All throughout the day I kept looking at my watch and expecting to see an hour closer to 5pm but to my surprise and bewilderment, it seemed to crawl. Mind you it wasn’t just my imagination because a co-worker also said the exact same thing, “Is it just me or is the time going by really, really slow?”

I dunno but it certainly felt like late afternoon already when in reality it was barely 2pm. Normally time goes so much faster when I’m busy but once I swear it felt like I had been working for an hour and when I checked the time, only 15mins had gone by!! It was very weird.

I think it’s time’s way of mocking me.

Kitchen Duty

We have kitchen duty at work. Our small company provides us with lunch and so we come to work everyday without having to spend lunch money. It is pretty convenient and the food is always good. The one downside to it is that we all take turns doing kitchen duty. Normally, we’re grouped together into smaller teams and each team gets a week of kitchen duty every month. It rotates so we often find ourselves in different weeks of the month and in different teams. It’s not the idea of kitchen duty that bugs me. It is the fact that some people are plain lazy. I don’t understand why some people leave their dirty dishes and utensils on the sink when the dish washer is right beside it. How hard could it possibly be to put your dirty dishes away?

Another thing that bothers me is the fact that not all team members do their part. We all don’t like it but we still gotta do it… We get free lunch everyday and not just any food but really good food and our kitchen is always full of snacks and fruits. The least we can do is to help keep the place clean.

Just because it isn’t your week to do kitchen duty doesn’t mean you have to be a slob.

"Happy Friday"

“Happy Friday!”

Steve’s first words today when I saw him.

I couldn’t help but smile. I love Fridays. It means…

No work the following day
I get to sleep in
I can stay up late
I get to do whatever I want
No pesky co-workers
The weekend’s just beginning
I’ve survived another week of torture

I feel like doing a little dance. LOL.

Laptop Reformatted

After much bugging and procrastinating, dad finally decided to back my files up and re-format my dear laptop. I, apparently, had over 1GB of files in total and could not fit in his USB memory stick. I don't know where he put my data into and I could only suspect he moved everything into an external hard drive since I saw it hooked to my laptop the other night. Last night was the first time I had actually used my laptop again since he wiped it clean. I was surprised to find that he had installed Windows VISTA as my OS instead of Windows XP. It took me a few seconds to grasp what I was seeing. No wonder everything looked a little off.

Personally, I don’t like re-formatting my machine. I know it is good to re-format once in awhile but it’s always such a hassle to have to put everything back in again. I have to look for my CD installers again, re-install all my programs and put all my documents back in. I always worry that in the process, I might lose something – an important file, my purchased music, photos or projects I’ve spent a lot of time on. Not to mention all the links I’ve saved in My Favorites. Ugh.

I know VISTA is still relatively new and like any other, it still has some problems. I am a bit hesitant to use it but dad seems to really want it so I’m letting him do whatever he wants. Anyway, if it doesn’t work out, I can always re-format again and put XP back on.

The Hidden Good

There are so many hidden talents and so much good in the most unlikely people. What’s sad about it is that we are far too busy minding ourselves and taking notice of the flashy things that surround us that we fail to see the light in others.

It is true that we should be wary. There are a lot of bad people out there who have malicuous intentions. But we forget that there are also a lot of good people out there who have such kind hearts.

Sometimes I encounter people who seem to have extinguished the good in them and then there are times when I encounter people who I am sure would go straight to heaven if they died. I am thankful to encounter such good people that help restore my faith in humanity.

Work

I’m totally glad I am done with my training session for the day and that I have the rest of the day to myself to do other things… except now I am left thinking of things to keep me occupied till 5pm. Tsk tsk. Steve was just saying how we both complain when we’re swamped and we complain when there’s absolutely nothing to do. LOL. Why can’t the world be perfect?

It looks like there are impending changes within this small company of ours and both D and I will have to move to yet another section of the building. I’ve moved a total of 3 times and moving again means a fourth time for me. I love my spot right now and would hate to move but then again, it isn’t up to me and I pretty much have to suck it in. Bummer. I can only hope for a quiet, decent spot somewhere.

I hate this company. Unfortunately, looking for another job is also a lot of work. I’m being lazy, I know.

Out of the Loop

I’m so out of the loop when it comes to Philippine news and gossip. Not that I followed it before anyway but lately I realize when someone mentions a name, a show, some new dance move or a new expression, I feel my eyebrows crease and my whole facial expression turns into one, big, puzzled look. I realize I have no idea what they’re talking about.

And so lately, Google has been my friend, providing me with enough info or at least giving me an idea of what it is. Of course Google can only do so much and it doesn’t really help when you are trying to find out what a certain Filipino expression/slang really means. In fact, Google is only useful for tracking news and a few pictures here and there.

You don’t notice the changes that happen around you, the different little things that evolve and take place and then you move half-way around the world and every little thing is magnified.

Do you realize I have no idea what Big Brother is?!

Embarrassing as it is, I have to admit I am getting pretty slow on some of the goings-on.